Patrick Warburton as

Episodes 69

May 1, 1999

When the Griffin Family gets new neighbors that move in next door, Lois quickly becomes friends with Bonnie, Meg soon becomes attracted to their son, Kevin, and Peter becomes annoyed by the entire situation. After Peter injures the best player on his company's baseball team, Mr. Weed forces him to find a replacement, so Peter quickly changes his mind about his neighbors and invites Joe to play. When Joe shows up at the game, Peter learns that he is in a wheelchair. Joe ends up being the star of the game, which makes Peter jealous, as he wants to be a hero too. Peter ends up trying to stop a bank robbery to prove his value, but ends up getting caught up in the whole situation.

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6.7

Holy Crap

2x2
September 30, 1999

Peter's very religious father comes to live with the family after he is forced to retire from his lifelong job at the Mill.

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March 28, 2000

When Lois become the director of the Quahog Players production of “The King and I” Peter wants a part. He finds himself in the Producer’s Chair and starts to make some “artistic changes” to the script that involve scantily-clad women and cyborgs.

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March 28, 2000

Forced to go to a women’s retreat for telling sexist jokes at work, Peter resists the idea at first. After two weeks, however, Peter becomes a sensitive male. No one likes the new Peter, especially Lois. While attending a charity dinner, Lois does something that snaps Peter out of his feminine phase.

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April 4, 2000

To get a favorite show back on the air, Peter convinces the “Make-a-Dream Come True” foundation that Chris is dying. The scam leads to Peter “magically healing” Chris and some people begin to worship him.

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April 18, 2000

Peter runs into a former classmate of his while at the amusement park that the classmate founded. Contemplating his own legacy, Peter starts to think about his future. Chris gives Peter a painting that he painted in order to cheer Peter up, but Peter ends up selling it to a New York art gallery for $5,000. Realizing that Chris might be his only hope to have a lasting legacy, Peter pushes Chris to follow his dream of becoming an artist. The family then moves to New York so Chris can become famous.

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April 25, 2000

Meg's slumber party is ruined by her family. She is sick of being embarrassed by them and secretly books the family on a talk show. Intrigued by their story, a network executive gets Peter to sign the family up to be on a reality show. Things quickly go awry, and the Griffins want out of the contract. However, the network owns their namesake, and the family is eventually replaced.

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8.4

E. Peterbus Unum

2x18
July 12, 2000

The town zoning laws won't allow Peter to build a pool in his yard. When he tries to get a permit, he discovers that his property is actually not part of Quahog, and therefore not part of the United States. Armed with this new information, Peter makes his land his own country, calling it Petoria. When Peter gets no respect in the United Nation, he decides to invade Joe's pool, which brings the U.S. Army to his border. The Griffins can only survive so long without water, electricity, heat, or access to the United States, and finally, Lois and the kids leave President Peter, along with Brian, to his third-world country. Peter finally repatriates only a week after seceding.

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8.2

Wasted Talent

2x20
July 25, 2000

In homage to “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory”, a local brewery has a contest offering tours of the plant to whoever finds a scroll placed in their beer. Lois’ prodigy piano student, Ling, drops from an upcoming competition leaving Lois at a loss, until Peter comes home drunk and sits down at the piano.

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8.0

Lethal Weapons

3x7
August 22, 2001

Bonnie convinces Lois to join her Tae-Jitsu class and Quahog is invaded by New York "leafers" coming to look at the pretty colored leaves in fall. Lois quickly becomes a black-belt, and Peter uses his new dangerous wife to drive away all the annoying New Yorkers. However, Lois' new-found violent side finds its way into the Griffin household, and after trying counseling, the whole family has an all-out brawl to get it out of their system.

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September 19, 2001

Peter, Still out of a job, and now severely obese, decides to take on a new profession: Fishing. After buying a boat at a police auction, he soon finds himself in debt to a loan shark. When Peter hears of a legendary fish that, when caught, could win him the money he needs, he and the guys go searching for the mystical creature called 'Daggermouth'. Meanwhile, Lois tries to cheer up Meg with a spring break trip, where Lois is the one getting all the attention.

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October 8, 2001

Peter goes with Lois to visit her sister Carole, who is now pregnant, but alone since her husband walked out on her. Carole goes into labor and Peter helps deliver the baby. Caught up in the moment, Peter and Lois decide that they want another baby. Stewie however, does not agree. Stewie does everything possible to keep Peter and Lois away from each other, but when he is locked out of their room, he is forced to take desperate measures. Stewie ends up shrinking himself down to microscopic size and seeking out his sperm-brother inside Peter's body. Instead of trying to kill his unborn brother Stewie and him unite to destroy Lois.

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November 29, 2001

Peter and Lois go to the Pewterschmidts for the weekend, bringing Brian along. Brian, meanwhile, has some "issues" of his own to work out. Find out if Brian's future is to make puppies or become "less" than he is.

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Christmas comes to Quahog! While Lois attempt to make the holidays perfect for the Griffin family, Peter messes it up. Meanwhile, Stewie learns of Santa Claus’ ability to keep 24-hour surveillance on all the world’s children.

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January 17, 2002

When Brian is arrested for drunk driving, he's forced to do community service, which consists of helping Pearl, a middle-aged, agoraphobic, bitter woman. Brian gets so fed up with her insanity, that he storms out of her house. Later, Brian watches a television documentary that reveals Pearl's past as a top advertising jingle singer of the 1950s and 60s. Brian warms up to her, realizing where her pain comes from, and eventually she warms up to him too. He convinces Pearl to actually go outside, but she gets by a bus. While on her deathbed, Brian and Pearl share a fantasy intimate moment, but as they are about to kiss, she dies. Meanwhile, Peter grows a beard and learns that a swallow has nested inside it. He wants to shave it off but can't when he finds out the bird is an endangered species. Peter eventually grows attached to the bird and starts feeling maternal. Lois is finally able to convince Peter to let the bird fly away and also teaches Brian about moving on with his life after Pearl's death.

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January 31, 2002

Peter's jealousy reaches new heights when he accompanies Lois to the gynecologist. As the doctor prepares to examine Lois, Peter refuses to let him near her. Later, while shopping, Lois runs into an ex-boyfriend, Ross Fishman, who innocently asks her out for coffee. Fearful of Peter over-reacting, Lois sneaks off to meet Ross. At the same time, Joe picks up Peter for a joyride in his new high-tech surveillance van. While parked outside a diner, they see Lois and Ross inside. Using the van's high-tech gadgets, Peter misinterprets Lois and Ross' words. Angered, Peter decides to make Lois jealous by hiring prostitutes to pose as his ex-girlfriends. Realizing their marriage needs help, Lois and Peter see a marriage therapist, who suggests placing video cameras around the house for a week. After viewing the tapes, the therapist recommends that Peter and Lois date other people during a trial separation. Quagmire, hoping to take advantage of Lois' vulnerability, invites her on a date to a restaurant where they run into Peter and his gorgeous date, Jennifer Love Hewitt. Lois becomes enraged with jealousy and shoos Peter's date away. They leave together happily.

Meanwhile, Stewie and Brian accidentally super glue themselves together at the store. They have to wait a week before the solvent arrives in the mail. While stuck together, they actually begin to like one another. Of course, things return to normal the moment they're released from their glued prison.

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February 14, 2002

In a special three-story episode, Brian reads viewer mail and tries to answer profound questions:

"Li'l Griffins" The Griffins as the little rascals. Kid versions of Peter, Joe, and Brian decide that they don't need girls. When they first meet Lois however, they quickly abandon their anti-girl sentiment. In school, Lois reads a book touting the virtues of bravery, and Peter and Quagmire try to prove who's the bravest by staying in a haunted house overnight.

"No Bones About it"

Peter rubs a beer bottle and a Genie pops out to grant him three wishes. Peter first wishes that Jackie Gleason wasn't dead. A zombie-like Gleason terrorizes the Griffins until Stewie blasts it dead. Peter then wishes he didn't have any bones. The Genie transforms him into a gelatin blob and he can no longer have sex. Upset, Peter flushes himself down the toilet and winds up in Hollywood. He meets a doctor who tells him about a re-boning procedure. Peter gets the operation, which turns out came from bones donated from his own family.

"Super Griffins" A tanker truck containing radioactive waste slams into the Griffin house. The radiation affects each Griffin in a different way. Lois gains super strength while Peter has morphing ability. Lois tells her family that they must not abuse their powers. Of course that doesn't work and the town is forced to hold a meeting to see how to stop the Griffins from wreaking havoc. Adam West realizes he must fight fire with fire. He volunteers to roll around in toxic waste but he only gets lymphoma as a result. The Griffins, racked with guilt, use their powers to make Adam's recovery more comfortable.

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June 12, 2005

When Peter hears Loretta scream, he tries to help out, but discovers Loretta is cheating on Cleveland. Peter figures out that it was Quagmire and decides to tell Cleveland about it. But when Loretta walks out on Cleveland he doesn't take it lightly.

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9.3

Petarded

4x6
June 19, 2005

After winning a game of Trivial Pursuit, Peter is convinced he is a genius. To prove Peter wrong, Brian suggests he take a test of the MacArthur Genius Grant. The test results say that Peter is technically mentally challenged. Peter has no problem abusing this handicap until Lois is injured and the kids are taken away because Peter is not mentally fit for parenting.

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June 26, 2005

"The Bachelorette" comes to Quahog and Brian is chosen to be a contestant. Brian does not like the show, but participates just to have a vacation only to wind up falling in love with the bachelorette. Meanwhile, Chris gets a nasty pimple on his cheek, which talks to Chris and likes to cause mischief.

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July 24, 2005

Lois fulfills a lifelong dream of being a model. Stewie starts on a multi-level marketing company. Brian in need of cash to buy his de-worming medication agrees to become his salesman.

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6.5

Jungle Love

4x13
September 25, 2005

When Chris is supposed to be hazed for a school tradition, he runs off to South America; Peter quickly becomes frustrated by his new job at the beer factory.

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7.5

PTV

4x14
November 6, 2005

After a “wardrobe malfunction” occurs during a live broadcast, the FCC begins to censor all of Peter’s favorite shows. As a result, Peter creates his own station, PTV, which broadcasts from the Griffin home. Peter and Brian create their own edgy programming until the FCC shows up to shut down PTV and censor all controversial material in Quahog.

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November 13, 2005

After writing a story for a local magazine, Brian gets a job at The New Yorker.

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November 27, 2005

Lois discovers she has a brother named Patrick and takes the family cross-country to meet him. It turns out; he’s locked up in a mental institution. Lois thinks he’s sane, so she checks him out to live with the Griffins. Meanwhile, Peter starts the Society for the Acceptance of Fat Men. But when all the fat men of Quahog are strangled one-by-one the group lives in fear. Who could the “Fat Man Strangler” be?

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January 8, 2006

After Brian has a near-death experience in the hospital, he decides to lead a new life. He ends up getting a nightly singing gig with Frank Sinatra Jr., but his new lifestyle doesn't last very long. Meanwhile, Meg, after joining a new after-school group, pretends to be a lesbian.

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7.0

Patriot Games

4x20
January 29, 2006

At his high school reunion, Peter tries to impress his fellow classmates. When Peter, heading for the bathroom, charges through the crowd of people, impresses quarterback Tom Brady, who offers Peter a spot on the New England Patriots. Meanwhile, Brian owes Stewie money, after Stewie becomes a sports bookie.

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March 12, 2006

When Peter wins a maid for a week as a prize on a game show, Quagmire gains an interest in her, and they eventually marry. Quagmire, stricken with his bachelor ways, tries to get out of the marriage. Meanwhile, Lois stops breast-feeding Stewie, who, as a result, goes through withdrawals.

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7.5

Peterotica

4x24
April 23, 2006

After reading an erotic novel, Peter gets the idea to write one himself. Carter gets sued for publishing Peter's book on tape and loses all his money, where he is forced to become a middle-class citizen. Meanwhile, Stewie tries to train for the Olympics.

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Brian's gay cousin Jasper visits the Griffin house and announces that he is engaged to his partner and wants to be married at their house. When Mayor West bans gay marriage in an effort to cover up and bring attention away from a scandal of his own, Brian resorts to hostile actions to try to change the Mayor's mind. Lois and Peter question their view towards gay marriage while Chris joins the "Young Republicans" Club to impress a girl.

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7.0

Petergeist

4x26
May 7, 2006

Peter wants to top Joe, who just built a new home theater system, so he starts to build a multiplex in his backyard. In doing so, he discovers an Indian burial ground. He finds an Indian chief's skull and the Griffin house becomes haunted. Stewie gets sucked into the television and strange events follow as they try to get Stewie back from the poltergeist.

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September 10, 2006

Stewie becomes obsessed with Lois, after she saves Rupert. Though Lois doesn't take to the new Stewie all too well. Meanwhile, Peter thinks his doctor is molesting him, when he undergoes a prostate exam.

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7.3

Chick Cancer

5x7
November 26, 2006

Stewie ties the knot with his old flame Olivia, but their relationship quickly turns, and becomes normal dull marriage. It all escalates when they go on a double date with Brian and Jillian. Meanwhile, Lois introduces Peter to chick flicks, so he decides to make his own movie with a plot based on every chick movie ever.

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7.0

Road to Rupert

5x9
January 28, 2007

Brian sells Rupert at a garage sale. Stewie, who is upset with Brian, takes him cross country to Colorado to find his beloved teddy, and ends up having a ski-off to win back Rupert. Meanwhile, Peter loses his license, so Meg has to drive him around.

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February 18, 2007

When a bully harasses Chris, Peter goes to his defense, but ends up beating him up. Peter realizes bullying is fun and begins to bully everyone in the house. Finally, Chris stands up to Peter and beats him senseless. Meanwhile, Stewie goes out without sunscreen and becomes obsessed with getting a tan. After Brian leaves him in the tanning booth for six hours, Stewie gets sunburned and fears he has cancer. While waiting for the results of his cancer screening, Stewie begins to live his life as if he had only days to live and drives Brian crazy with his demands.

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7.3

Airport '07

5x12
March 4, 2007

Quagmire takes Peter to work but Peter messes things up, causing Quagmire to lose his job as a pilot. After not being able find another job, Peter and Cleveland make plans to help him get his old job back. When the plan fails, Quagmire receives advice from his idol, Hugh Hefner.

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March 25, 2007

The Griffin family decides to start their own restaurant, though have a hard time attracting customers. After Joe promises to help, Peter is excited at the fact of it becoming a local hangout for the police. However, things don't really turn out as hoped, and instead it begins to be popular with the handicapped. When Peter attempts to change the place, a sudden twist of irony quickly changes his mind.

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Lois runs for mayor of Quahog, though she doesn't become the front-runner until she dumbs down her political views. Once in office, she becomes corrupted with the power that she now holds, and begins accepting bribes so that she can buy herself expensive things. Meanwhile, Peter comes to enjoy being the "first lady" of Quahog, and all of the perks that go along with it.

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October 7, 2007

When Joe feels that his disability is holding Bonnie back from living a full life, he decides to get a leg transplant. Excited about his new ability to walk, Joe engages in extreme sports, and soon ditches his current friends, for more active ones. Peter and the guys are upset at how Joe is acting and decide to teach him a lesson.

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November 4, 2007

Lois and Peter sail off on a cruise. Jealous that he was left behind, Stewie's matricidal tendencies are rekindled. When Brian challenges him to actually do it, Stewie carries out his diabolical plan.

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February 17, 2008

James Woods returns to seek revenge against Peter. James Woods finds Peter's wallet, which he lost at Barry Manilow concert, and procedes to steal Peter's identity, and his family. Peter decides to ruin James' career and image.

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April 27, 2008

Brian, afraid that he may have lost his last chance at love, searches for a former flame, Tracy. To his surprise, he discovers that he is the father to her son, Dylan. Tracy decides that Brian should raise the boy, and she drops him off at the Griffin's house. When Dylan runs rough-shot in the house, Brian's attitude towards parenting doesn't settle too well with Lois and Peter.

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7.8

Long John Peter

6x12
May 4, 2008

When Peter gets a pet parrot, he begins acting like a pirate. Peter accidentally kills the bird after raising hell through all of Quahog. Meanwhile, when Brian is visiting the vet, Chris falls in love with the intern, Anna.

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7.0

Love Blactually

7x1
September 28, 2008

Dissatisfied with his current love life, Brian decides to slow things down when he meets the girl of his dreams, Carolyn. However, Cleveland soon sweeps Carolyn off her feet, and Brian must do anything he can do, to win her back, even if it means involving Cleveland's ex-wife, Loretta.

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October 5, 2008

When Peter re-discovers his love for the painfully annoying yet seductively catchy tune "Surfin' Bird," Brian and Stewie decide to take matters into their own hands to ensure that the song will never be heard again! On the verge of tears, Peter goes to every record store in Quahog to track down his beloved jingle, and he runs into a familiar face and ends up hanging out with Jesus Christ.

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8.0

Road to Germany

7x3
October 19, 2008

Mort Goldman accidentally steps into Stewie's time machine and goes back in time to 1939 Poland, and Brian and Stewie follow to retrieve him. When they find him, the Nazis invade and Mort is taken to Germany, where Stewie and Brian must go to save him, as well as find a way back to the present.

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November 2, 2008

Peter gets a lasting supply of gasoline for the year, so the family decides to use it to take a road trip to the Grand Canyon. They pack up and hit the road, but it takes them a while to realize that they had forgotten to bring Stewie with them; when they do, they must make their way home posthaste.

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February 15, 2009

After being pregnant for seven years, Bonnie finally gives birth to a beautiful baby girl named Susie! Stewie quickly falls for the little tyke and vows to do anything to win her heart and get in her diaper. Meanwhile, Joe borrows $20,000 from a bookie to pay for Bonnie's medical bills, but then plans to steal the money from Mr. Pewterschmidt to pay his debt.

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7.3

Family Gay

7x8
March 8, 2009

To help pay off his incredible debt, Peter participates in medical experiments to make some extra cash. First, he is injected with the "Seth Rogen" gene that "gives you the appearance of being funny even though you haven't actually done anything funny." Then he is injected with a gene that leads him to a new mate, leaving a broken-hearted Lois behind. Although the family is crushed, they quickly realize the most important thing is that Peter is happy.

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6.8

FOX-y Lady

7x10
March 22, 2009

Lois gets a job working for FOX News and has to do a report on a liberal filmmaker. However, she loses the job when her story implicates a conservative radio host.

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7.5

420

7x12
April 19, 2009

Brian and Stewie attempt to rally Quahog to try and legalize marijuana.

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7.4

Stew-Roids

7x13
April 26, 2009

Stewie starts going to the gym with Peter after he gets beaten up by Joe's baby daughter Susie, but just when it seems that his hard work is paying off, Peter reveals that he's been giving him anabolic steroid. Meanwhile, Chris begins dating a popular girl at school, only to see her popularity subside.

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7.3

Three Kings

7x15
May 10, 2009

Peter learns from a psychic through a palm reading that he had a fascinating past life in the 17th century as Griffin Peterson, a dignified English gentleman who vied for the love of Lady Redbush in the newly founded American colony of Quahog.

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September 27, 2009

With the help of an out-of-this-world remote control, Stewie and Brian travel through alternate universes, including a post-apocalyptic world and a parallel world run by dogs where humans are pets.

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October 11, 2009

Chevy Chase and Dan Aykroyd move to Quahog. Brian and Stewie find out about their secret agency. They are told that there are Russian Sleeper Cells all over US. They go talk to Mayor West, and find out he is one of the sleeper cells. They follow Mayor West to Russia where they disable a nuke aimed at the US.

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November 8, 2009

When Brian begins dating an older woman, the family begins to make fun of him. After Brian's new fling breaks her hip, he gets the pleasure of becoming her errand boy.

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6.8

Quagmire's Baby

8x6
November 15, 2009

Father doesn't know best when Quagmire assumes responsibility for a baby left at his doorstep. Meanwhile, Stewie creates a stupid clone of himself that he uses as a slave. When he ends up creating a clone for Brian too, they find out that the clones are unstable, at which point the clones break down.

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November 22, 2009

Peter and the guys interview potential friends to fill the vacancy left by Cleveland. Meanwhile, Brian discovers that Quagmire hates him.

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7.4

Dog Gone

8x8
November 29, 2009

When Brian accidentally kills another dog, he is surprised to see that no one cares, so he tries to convince everyone that the life of a dog should have the same value as a human one. Meanwhile, Lois hires a maid who doesn’t listen to Peter

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6.8

Business Guy

8x9
December 13, 2009

When Peter gives Lois’ dad the bachelor party he never had, Mr. Pewterschmidt goes into a coma. Even Dr. House can't help. Lois gains control of Pewterschmidt Industries which she passes to Peter. He gets power-hungry and fires the board. Mr. Pewterschmidt bounces back and tries to regain control of what he’s built.

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January 3, 2010

When Peter hits his head and suffers amnesia after getting in a fight with Richard Dawson on Family Feud, he forgets everything about his life, including his family and friends. In an attempt to try to bring back his memory, Lois decides to reintroduce Peter to his old self, until he begins to hit on other women, much to Lois's dismay. She decides to take the kids and leave Peter, giving Quagmire the opportunity to score with Lois. Peter now must prove to Lois he can remember her and make himself worthy of her again.

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January 31, 2010

Brian gets a gig writing for a teen magazine about the average American girl, but when he starts trailing Meg for research he discovers that her desperate attempts at dating have led her to a guy in the slammer. When Brian tries to expose Meg’s secret to the family, he finds out that her boyfriend, Luke, has broken out of jail and has been hiding in the Griffin’s house.

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February 14, 2010

When Chris and Stewie go missing for several days, Lois is at her wit's end until she sees a psychic who assures her they are safe. Even after the boys return home, Lois and Peter's psychic obsession continues, and Peter takes it a step too far when he starts charging neighbors for his extrasensory perception. Meanwhile, Chris develops a crush on a girl at school.

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6.8

April in Quahog

8x16
April 11, 2010

When the local news announces that the Earth will be destroyed by a black hole in 24 hours, everyone in Quahog goes nuts trying to live out their last day.

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Peter makes good on another power outage at home--by entertaining his family with a retelling of Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back. Newcomers to the story include Mort as Lando Calrissian, Chris' boss Carl as Yoda, and the Giant Chicken as the nefarious Boba Fett.

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September 26, 2010

In this murder mystery special, The Griffins as well as all the other major characters become trapped in a mansion while they are killed off one by one.

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November 14, 2010

After Lois dominates her competition in the boxing ring, Peter decides to become her promoter.

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December 12, 2010

Stewie’s favorite thing after his teddy bear, Rupert, is Christmas. So when he hears that Santa is making an appearance at the mall, he begs Brian to take him so that he can tell Santa in person what he wants for Christmas. Brian begrudgingly takes Stewie to the mall, only to get the brush-off from Santa. As a result, Stewie and Brian travel to the North Pole to find Santa and teach him a lesson in holiday cheer.

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January 9, 2011

Peter needs a new kidney after his energy-drink addiction causes renal failure. Meanwhile, Chris is chosen to introduce United States President Barack Obama at his school after winning an essay contest. Trouble is, Meg wrote the essay.

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