Vicky Pollard is caught hiding mix n' match candy in her pants at a supermarket. Dafydd comes out to his parents, but his mother's reaction is not quite what he expects. Emily has a new companion, a novice transvestite with a moustache. Marjorie Dawes advises one of her Fat Fighters to "waddle back to your seat". At the local spa, Bubbles offers to pay her huge bills in an inappropriate manner. Maggie and Judy's stomachs turn on learning the jam at the village fete was made by a lesbian.

Emily and Florence visit a bridal shop to try on some very lady-like wedding dresses, Harvey demands "Bitty" in a restaurant, Bubbles De Vere singes herself while evading capture, Andy sees off Lou's new girlfriend, Sebastian meets his match in Marvin the US President's political aide, Dafydd decides to start a gay stall at the village fête, Vicky Pollard goes roller-skating in a pink string bikini, and Judy and Maggie are soon sick of Blake's 7 star Paul Darrow.

Vicky makes a nuisance of herself on a bus, Lou takes Andy to the ice-rink, on their ladylike saunter through the park Emily and Florence encounter some boisterous boys playing football, and Dafydd goes to an audition for the Llandewi Breffi version of Hamlet. Meanwhile, Marjorie Dawes surprises everyone at Fat Fighters by being nice to the longsuffering Meera (although it's got nothing to do with Meera's lottery win, honest!).

Vicky Pollard tries to con her way into a Blazin' Squad gig. Daffyd is disgusted when barmaid Myfanwy marries her girlfriend Rhiannon. Lou and Andy go bowling, while Emily and Florence have a go at tennis. Kenny Craig has got himself a girlfriend; Harvey gets hungry when he and his fiancée meet their wedding caterer; and Dead Ringers star John Culshaw makes a guest appearance as Andrew Lloyd Webber.

Lou and Andy visit the seaside. Dafydd is back in the village after watching a rugby match. Vicky Pollard shows off her new black boyfriend. In a quiet English church, worshippers are startled to hear visiting Harlem preacher, the Reverend Jessie King urging them to get out of the ghetto. Meanwhile, Marjorie Dawes does her best to ruin a Fat Fighters' engagement party, and love-struck aide Sebastian behaves outrageously at the Prime Minister's election victory party.