Phil finally agrees to sell the old station wagon but only after a family trip down memory lane; Cameron asks Jay for help when Mitchell decides to build a life-size princess castle for Lily.

Gloria decides to honor her late grandmother by cooking more traditional Colombian meals; Claire finds out Alex is interested in a boy; Mitchell's aversion to public displays of affection causes an argument.

When an earthquake hits, Claire gets stuck in the bathroom with the plumber; Manny experiences an existential crisis while out with Jay; Mitchell and Cameron use the quake as an excuse to get out of a party thrown by a friend (Nathan Lane).

Claire tries to stop Phil from embarrassing himself at a realtors' banquet by giving an unfunny speech, while Mitchell tries to convince Cameron to change his wardrobe. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria go to a quinceañera hosted by one of his employees, and Haley gives Alex advice on how to be cool.

In an attempt to reconnect the family, Phil and Claire challenge the family to see who can abstain from using their electronic devices the longest. Meanwhile, Mitchell and Cameron attempt to get Lilly into the best pre-school and Gloria deals with the neighbor's barking dog.

Claire gets ready to spookify the Dunphy house for the trick or treaters during her favorite holiday. She gives each family member a role to play, but nothing goes right. Cameron won't stop hating the holiday due to a traumatic childhood experience. Mitchell had a terrible day at work, and Gloria acts weird after Jay and Manny tease her about her accent.

Claire and Haley have a bit of quality girl time while they're stuck at home sick, and Phil is preoccupied by the taunts of a chirping smoke detector. Gloria and Manny's surprise visit at Jay's work leads to headaches for Jay, and Cameron gets swept up by all the lights and cameras when he goes behind Mitchell's back and takes Lily for a commercial.

It's Manny's birthday and the family is gathering at a restaurant to celebrate, though Manny himself is depressed about getting older. Phil and Claire decide to engage in a not-so-friendly car race on the way to the restaurant, and Mitch and Cam get sidetracked when they stop at the mall to pick up a gift.

Mitchell tries to tell Cameron how he feels uncomfortable with his mom, Barb Tucker. Meanwhile, Haley breaks up with Dylan much to Phil's dismay and Claire's delight. Jay has a little stomach ache that gets exacerbated when he and Manny look it up on the Internet.

At Luke and Manny's first school dance, Jay and Phil take them to the mall which turns disastrous, Claire's happiness turns into jealousy when Gloria joins the school dance committee. Meanwhile, Cameron and Mitchell learn about Lily biting other kids at the playground.

Claire becomes a determined neighborhood vigilante hoping to catch and stop a menacing car that speeds though their streets. Meanwhile, Phil is busy trying to land an important listing with a difficult client, Jay teaches Manny how to ride a bike -- only to learn Gloria needs lessons too -- and Mitchell and Cameron stumble upon a mysterious neighbor who is quite the charmer.

Phil and Claire pressure Alex to ease back on her school work, but begin to worry about their own intellectual drives. Meanwhile, Jay is upset when Gloria tries to befriend a new couple, and Mitchell runs into an old female flame.

It's Phil and Claire's anniversary, and when the kids go to surprise them with breakfast in bed, they get a surprise of their own. Jay and Gloria's plans for a Vegas vacation are ruined because of a brutally honest email accidentally sent to Claire, and Mitchell and Cam try to get into a new restaurant owned by a mom at Lily's preschool.

Claire and Phil decide to reprise their role-playing adventure from last year's Valentine's Day. Meanwhile, Jay's surprise plans for Gloria keeps getting interrupted, and a secret admirer comes between Cameron and Mitchell.

The guest list for Lily's princess-themed birthday party gets a little out of hand when Mitchell decides to invite his mom, much to Claire's dismay, and disinvite Fizbo, much to Cameron's dismay. Things get even more strange when DeDe shows up with Claire's old high school boyfriend in tow, and Jay and Gloria each turn to their own unique methods of dealing with this gathering of misfits.

Phil and Claire have a huge fight and Phil hasn't a clue as to what it was over, so Gloria steps in to counsel Phil while Jay counsels Claire. Meanwhile, Jay has some regret in buying Gloria a karaoke machine, and Cameron is in full prep mode for a huge fund-raising event and asks Mitchell and Luke for help.

Claire runs herself ragged trying to fix the relationship between Haley and Alex, while Phil sneaks off to the spa. Meanwhile, Gloria is horrified by Jay's morbid plans to purchase two side-by-side crypts in preparation of their death, and Cameron decides he wants to write a book that celebrates the fact that Lily is adopted, but soon learns something new.

Luke becomes friends with a curmudgeon old neighbor, which does not please Phil and Claire. Meanwhile, Gloria and Manny try to get Jay to join them at the symphony, but in an attempt to avoid the concert, he instead ends up with Mitchell and Cameron on their "boys' night out" while Haley babysits for Lily.

Cameron is overzealous in his planning of the spring musical performance at Luke and Manny's school. Jay's brother visits while Phil convinces the family to be in his new TV ad.

Mitchell and Cameron assess their family members in trying to decide who would best take care of Lily should anything happen to them.

Claire and Gloria's Mother's Day excursion outdoors with the kids turns into the mother of all disasters. Meanwhile, Phil and Jay share an awkward moment when they stay home to prepare dinner for everyone, and Cameron worries about gender roles in his relationship with Mitchell.

Jay advises a dog trainer, while Phil and Claire switch parenting duties to the kids' chagrin. Mitchell has an extra Lady Gaga ticket when Cameron ends up sick.

The whole family is gathering at Jay's before heading out to Alex's graduation ceremony from middle school, but while at the house, Jay is preoccupied hiding a botox mishap from everyone, Cameron is upset about Mitchell's habit of laughing at his expense, and Phil tries to sympathize with, yet also criticizes Claire on her impending breakdown over the kids growing up too fast. All of this, plus a faulty gate, could mean their missing Alex's big moment.

Jay wants to go fishing on his birthday, but the family insists he have a big party, leading Claire and Mitchell to get trapped in their childhood yard, Phil to encounter his college nemesis at the mall and Cameron to have trouble at the bakery.

While vacationing on Lost Creek Ranch, the three families try their hands at a little cattle herding, skeet shooting and horseback riding. There are also some big firsts, a huge surprise and an actual face-off between Jay and a cowboy named Hank.

Mitchell and Cameron plan an evening with the whole family to break the happy news that they're attempting to adopt another child. However, things go wrong when they realize Lily may not take well to another baby in the house. Meanwhile, Claire and Jay are each focused with proving a point.

Jay's relationship with the dog irritates Gloria. Phil and Luke try to master the tightrope. Cameron starts a juice fast.

Jay helps Manny with a school fundraiser. Claire petitions for a stop sign at a busy intersection. Phil and Luke try to create a viral video. Gloria searches for Stella.

Gloria tries to help Jay and Manny with their problems but both are unreceptive. Claire considers running against Councilman Duane Bailey. Cam and Mitch are the victims of a hit-and-run accident.

Phil takes Haley to visit his alma mater. Claire goes out with Mitchell and Cameron. Gloria and Jay may have to broach a delicate subject with Manny.

Gloria persuades Jay to commit to a night of salsa dancing after seeing how much his friend Shorty and his girlfriend do together. Meanwhile, Cameron makes a bet that he can get a woman's phone number at the bar, and Phil builds a tree house for Luke.

The Pritchetts rally for a good cause after a neighbor's house burns down, but there's a downside to their Samaritan intentions when Jay throws out his back, Cameron takes on a moving truck, and some donated toys fall into the wrong hands.

When an old neighborhood kid returns to town as a hugely successful internet billionaire, it gets Phil thinking of what could have been. Jay feels Manny could use a little dose of constructive criticism, and Cameron is offended when Mitchell questions the authenticity of his colorful childhood stories.

The Pritchett clan decide to celebrate Christmas a little early (and in a hurry) so they split up to gather the holiday trappings as Mitchell, Alex and Lily hunt for a tree, Gloria and Luke fetch the ornaments, and Claire and Haley shop for the gifts. Meanwhile, Phil and Manny buy the groceries and Jay and Cameron stand by to wrap presents.

Phil contemplates the worst, after missing a call from the doctor. Elsewhere, Javier, Manny's biological father, pays another visit to take his son to the horse races, Mitchell wins an environmental law award, creating a competition between Cam and himself on who has the better trophy, and Gloria tutors Haley in Spanish.

Jay and Claire take control of their kids' school projects from Manny and Luke, while Haley and Gloria help Phil with a real estate presentation. Elsewhere, Cam and Mitchell meet with a potential birth mother.

Claire prepares for her debate with Duane Bailey. Mitch and Cam try to clean up Lily's language before her turn as a flower girl. Jay blames Stella's strange behavior on Gloria.

Phil's preoccupation with a business opportunity blinds him to his new partner's inappropriate behavior around Claire. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria may regret letting Mitchell and Cameron be their temporary house guests when their home is being fumigated.

Phil and Claire go overboard with drinks, and divulging personal information, on a night out to celebrate the sale of a house to Mitchell and Cameron's friends.

It's a day of disturbing realizations when Mitchell manages to ruin one of Jay's proudest golf moments, Phil overhears something that may forever change how he sees his little girl, and Gloria stumbles upon Claire's dangerous little secret.

Mitchell feels pressured to make Cameron's birthday extra special. People start to question Jay's manliness, and the girls interfere with Phil's leap day plans.

The funeral service for a beloved clown mentor reunites Cameron with his estranged ex-clown partner, Lewis. Phil is serious about landing a very important listing, only to get trumped by a notorious bulldozer of an agent, Mitzi Roth. Manny has a cool new friend, which makes both Jay and Gloria suspicious.

Claire's race for town council comes to a head on Election Day as the Dunphys make phone calls for votes and Mitchell and Cameron take to the streets to campaign, while the candidate endures technical problems during some last-minute interviews.

A visit from Cameron's father features an awkward dinner for Jay and Gloria at Mitchell and Cameron's house. Meanwhile, Claire helps Luke face the death of an older neighbor, Phil and Alex have a father-daughter bonding experience, and Haley throws a party without permission.

Phil buys a car without consulting Claire. Jay is on a mission to get to his high-school reunion with Gloria and Manny. Lily loses her favorite toy on a train.

When the family travels to Disneyland, Phil struggles to keep up with Luke, Claire is shocked when they run into Dylan, Jay and Gloria disagree about what are sensible shoes for the day, and Mitch and Cam must contain Lily's new affinity for running.

Gloria and Jay bicker while trying to order lunch at a diner. Claire and Cam have different theories on how to discipline kids. Luke accepts an award under false pretenses. Phil has a hard time firing Mitchell from his temporary job at the real estate agency. The entire family participates in Alex's living art display of Norman Rockwell's Thanksgiving painting.

Gloria's bilingualism comes in handy on Mitchell and Cameron's quest to adopt another child. Meanwhile, Jay and Manny help Lily get ready for a dance recital. Alex goes to her first prom, and Haley announces her future plans, which come as a shock to her family.