The Darling clan is back and this time need Andy's help to wed their daughter Charlene to Dud Walsh before crazy old Ernest T. Bass makes good on his threats to kidnap her and take her for his own. Andy sets Barney up as a decoy bride while the real wedding takes place elsewhere. The plan works, until Ernest kidnaps Barney and decides he's just as good a bride as Charlene.

When Ernest T. Bass is denied from joining the army, he blames Andy and threatens to break every window in Mayberry. When Andy learns the real reason for Ernest's denial, he finds a solution that benefits everyone...except Barney.

Andy is called to arrest Ernest T. Bass once again for disturbing one of Mrs. Wiley's socials. Sympathizing with his search for true love, Andy and Barney teach him how to act like a gentleman and bring him to Mrs. Wiley's next social. But when Ernest falls for Mrs. Wiley's niece, his true colors shine through.

Ernest T. Bass returns to Mayberry to get an education so his girlfriend will marry him. But when he meets his new teacher Helen, he falls in love with her. Now Andy has to help Helen give Ernest all the facts he needs, including the one about the true object of his affection.

To get his mind off throwing rocks through windows, Ernest T. Bass is given the job of being a traffic cop. However, when Ernest T. begins throwing bricks through car windows, Malcom Merriweather is assigned Ernest T.'s task, causing Ernest T. to vow for revenge.