Gary Starke is one of the best ticket scalpers in New York City. His girlfriend, Linda, doesn't approve of his criminal lifestyle, though, and dumps him when she gets the opportunity to study cooking in Paris. Gary realizes that he has to give up scalping if he has any chance of winning her back. But before he does, he wants to cash out on one last big score. He gets his chance when the pope announces he'll be performing Easter Mass at Yankee Stadium.

Colin is a Catholic and George is a poetry-loving Protestant. In Belfast in the 1980s, they could have been enemies, but instead they became business partners. After persuading a mad wig salesman, known as the Scalper, to sell them his leads, the two embark on a series of house calls