Granny gets 5th degree burns all over her body and has to get new skin.

Dan Halen hires Rusty to attract pedophiles.

After seeing Early's pitiful chickens, Dan Halen sets out to create the perfect chicken.

Rusty sells his soul to the devil for guitar playing skills.

After giant machines terrorize the land, dirty hippies show up to stop the "earth raping machines" with their good vibes, hacky sacks, and drum circles.

Early gets a lifelong friend as a result of Lil's failure to use condoms.

Dan Halen covers the town in a cloud of "Ice Wind", his new body spray. Meanwhile, the Sheriff takes up blogging and training for strongman competitions.

Rusty discovers the joy of crashing cars, and agrees to face the "Bashitizing Smashmaster" for a chance to win an iPod.

After the Sheriff learns from TV that the mud squid are an endangered species, he decides it's his sworn duty to protect the Cuyler family.

After the squids' house catches on fire, the Sheriff assesses the damage and investigates the fire's origin.

Early teaches Rusty that life is a game and first place is sex.

The apocalypse comes to rural Georgia.

A news magazine interviews and profiles the achievements and scandals of Dan Halen.

When Dan Halen offers a reward for the rare 'deep fried pine booby', Early goes on the hunt.

After Granny passes on, the only way to revive her is for Robert E. Lee to make sweet love to her.

When Palooka County is forced to conserve water due to a drought, Dan Halen enacts a complicated plan to get all the water he needs.

Dan Halen is possessed by a demon and builds a human sacrifice theme park mountain.

During the annual 'Mud Days' celebration, Dan Halen unleashes a strain of genetically modified corn that forces people to 'go green'.

Early's passion for Krystal spikes after she wins the lottery.