B.J. writes home to his wife, Peg, reporting Klinger's escape attempts, the visit of a formidable chaplain, and one of Frank's goof-ups.

A wounded colonel's gun, a showpiece, disappears, and Hawkeye and B.J. play a hunch and bluff Frank, who has it, into returning it.

Frank tries to distinguish himself by selling the camp garbage, but it's Hawkeye who finds a use for it: he dumps it on a troublesome Colonel Coner.

Everybody pitches in to save Colonel Potter's horse, who becomes sick while Potter is away in Tokyo. And Margaret asks Hawkeye, not Frank, to operate on her appendix.

Hawkeye starts sleepwalking and having horrific nightmares. He begins to think that he may be starting to lose his "war against the war."

Radar becomes an aspiring writer after ordering a flier from a comic book, and Hawkeye and B.J. give Frank a surprise birthday present that only he will appreciate.

A fouled radio call for help on a crossword puzzle leads to a senior officer coming to the 4077th to help with a supposed serious medical problem.

Colonel Potter hopes a Western will be the cure for the 4077th's morale problem. But during the show, the staff of the camp is forced to make its own entertainment during the frequent film breakages.

Hawkeye tries unsuccessfully to get to Seoul, to see Nurse Gilmore for the weekend. Meanwhile, Winchester has taped a letter home, asking for his influential parents to help get him back to the States. To get even, Hawkeye and B.J. switch Winchester's clothes, causing Winchester to alter his eating patterns.

Radar notices a number of tattoos on one of the wounded, and convinces himself that with a tattoo he will be irresistible to women. Everyone tries to discourage him, and he admits to having received a tattoo that will wash off. Meanwhile, Margaret is frustrated with a new nurse who keeps getting upset at the sight of combat injuries.

Lost behind enemy lines, Hawkeye and Margaret form a personal truce and seek shelter in a roadside hut.

With a temporary transfer of personnel between the 4077th and the 8063rd, Captain Roy Dupree replaces Hawkeye, whilst Lorraine Anderson makes eyes at Charles. Fearing this to be permanent, Charles and B.J. successfully conspire to have Dupree permanently removed from the 4077th. Charles (to Hawkeye): "God, I missed you!"

Hawkeye undergoes a drastic change when he becomes temporary commander of the 4077th, and learns about the tedious bureaucracy and accompanying headaches that Colonel Potter deals with daily.

Colonel Potter meets a female soldier of the same age and interests as himself, named Lil. The others in the camp think that he might be cheating on Mildred, even though his friendship with Lil is completely platonic. Meanwhile Hawkeye tries to find out what B.J.'s initials stand for. As it turns out, he was named after his parents, Bea and Jay Hunnicutt.

Newscaster Clete Roberts, reprising an earlier interview appearance, returns to update Korean War conditions, when he conducts a series of television talks with the leading characters of the 4077th.

A typical day in the life of Rosie's bar, complete with AWOL problem drinkers, a bound and gagged Winchester, and a gambling scheme.

Talk of a post-war reunion gives BJ an idea- planning a present-day stateside gathering of 4077th families. He continues to obsess with the idea even under the duress of bug-out instigated by a Chinese breakthrough. Also, Klinger fears that the party will blow his cover, as his mother doesn't know he's stationed in Korea.

Charles returns to the 4077th after a trip to Tokyo with an uncharacteristic hangover and the uneasy feeling of a romantic entanglement. Meanwhile, the hospital struggles to find a cure for an outbreak of deadly hemorrhagic fever.

A brawl at Rosie's Bar puts Rosie in the hospital, and the 4077th doctors are pressed into service as temporary saloon-keepers. Meanwhile, Father Mulcahy is apprehensive that his long-pending promotion to captain will again be denied. Potter: "The Pentagon. Weird looking building. Four walls and a spare. Monument to Murphy's Law."

Horrified by the gigantic size of his monthly bar tab at the officer's club, Hawkeye vows to give up booze for a week. Meanwhile, Winchester desperately tries to halt his sister's impending marriage to a man he considers unworthy of the Winchester heritage.

Angered by the way civilian doctors in the States are profiting from the war, Hawkeye presents the Army with a bill for his medical services. Meanwhile, Charles reluctantly demonstrates American medical practices to three Korean medics, and is on the receiving end of their medical expertise.

On New Year's Eve, the staff looks back on the highlights of 1951: The doctors invent an artificial kidney machine; Mulcahy plants a garden; Margaret takes up knitting; and Klinger and Winchester bet on which baseball team will win the pennant.

Margaret develops a case of prickly heat, Charles does his tax returns, and Klinger takes the P.A. apart - just some of the events, which occur during another unendurably, hot night at the 4077th.

Hawkeye wagers that he can go a full day without a wisecrack, and Winchester finally confronts the major who exiled him to the 4077th. Charles: "I will not, even for a return to that pearl of the Orient, Tokyo, lie to protect you while destroying a friend's career."

Winchester is sent to inspect sanitary conditions on the frontlines, while the rest of the camp plans a surprise anniversary party for B.J.

To boost post-yuletide morale on Dec 26, Potter has the officers and enlisted men change places for the day.

An AWOL soldier, Nick Gillis, seeks sanctuary in the mess tent, after Father Mulcahy's service. At the same time, a special Sunday brunch is due to be served, following the donation of some eggs to the camp by a grateful farmer.

Potter's attempts to assemble the crew for a family portrait are thwarted by a feud between bunkmates Pierce, Hunnicutt, and Winchester. Things are not helped by the efforts of Margaret, Klinger and Mulcahy to bring the Swampmen back together.

Tired of reminders about Trapper John's skill as a practical joker, B.J. bets Hawkeye he can prank everyone present.

Margaret and Hawkeye work on a time capsule to commemorate their time in Korea; Rizzo and BJ goof around with a fake hand grenade; Klinger becomes smitten with a young, pretty Korean war criminal.