Jesse Armstrong — Writer

Episodes 39

Warring Factions

8.7
September 19, 2003
1x1

Mark and Jeremy find themselves in competition for the same woman: Toni from next door. This is not the entire problem with Mark and his love life, rather, he is also lusting after Sophie, a co-worker, but finds himself at a loss with how to put his feelings into action. Jeremy is also pre-occupied, but not with love, with his music.

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The Interview

7.5
September 26, 2003
1x2

Jeremy faces a dilemma: money vs. art. Should he put all his time and effort into his music and try to 'make it' or should he be like Mark and get a 9 to 5 job to pay the bills (including three months of rent owed to Mark). Sophie is still the object of Mark's desires and he still fumbles about trying desperately to let her know how he feels.

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On The Pull

7.8
October 3, 2003
1x3

Mark and Jeremy go to a party to try and find some long lost love, or perhaps someone for the night. At the party Mark meets a cool goth 'teenager' named Valarie, who wants to take their acquaintance to the next level: bowling! This gives Jeremy a chance to hook up with Toni, and allows Mark to take his mind off of Sophie . . . or will it?

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Mark Makes A Friend

7.5
October 10, 2003
1x4

Mark attends a work conference and in the process makes a new friend, Alan Johnson, which upsets the 'El Dude' partnership. This forces Jeremy to consider who could replace Mark as flatmate and best friend. Super-Hands is the potential replacement, but he doesn't match up as well. Mark grows a moustache, like his new hero, Johnson whilst Jeremy is haunted by flashbacks to 'the one bad thing' that happened when he was wrecked with Super-Hands.

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Dream Job

10.0
October 17, 2003
1x5

Jeremy tries to wow Toni with his new job in a music studio while Mark gets passed over for promotion in favour of Sophie, and goes slowly round the twist. They then attempt to solve each other's problems with the help of phone stalking and pepper spray.

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Funeral

10.0
Season Finale
October 24, 2003
1x6

In the last episode of the series, death and terminal illness prove to be the keys to romantic success for Mark and Jeremy. Jeremy gets in with the Christians and Mark finds the perfect venue for a first date with Sophie - a funeral. Everyone's having a great time until the paramedics arrive.

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Dance Class

7.3
November 12, 2004
2x1

Can you love two people at the same time? Jeremy believes you can, and his gorgeous new American girlfriend puts his taboo bashing beliefs to the test. Mark believes you can only love one person. Besides, he and Sophie, the object of his unrequited love, are getting on really well, especially since he starting hacking into her emails.

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Jeremy Makes It

10.0
November 19, 2004
2x2

Jeremy is hired by an old school friend to make a soundtrack for a film he's making. Mark makes a new friend at work who turns out to hold a fair amount of prejudice. Meanwhile, Sophie spends time with Jeff.

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Local Zero

9.0
November 26, 2004
2x3

Jeremy wants to get closer to Nancy so he tries to impress her by joining in her volunteer work which involves working in a soup kitchen for the homeless. Mark manages to get Johnson to think he is an alcoholic.

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University Challenge

10.0
December 3, 2004
2x4

Mark, determined to forget Sophie, makes an effort to go out with April - but manages to blur the line between enthusiastic new boyfriend and stalker. Jeremy joins a new band, Executioners Bong, but insists that he is neither a roadie nor the equivalent of Bez.

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The Man Show

9.5
December 10, 2004
2x5

Mark becomes depressed about Sophie living with Jeff, but Jeremy is not sure that self-mutilation is the answer. Besides, Jeremy and Jeff are getting on horribly well.

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Wedding

10.0
Season Finale
December 17, 2004
2x6

Jeremy and Nancy are getting married, for visa reasons. Mark, determined to save his friend, will do whatever it takes to stop them...

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Mugging

6.3
November 11, 200530m
3x1

Mark has a run-in with some muggers, who steal his precious blackberry - and put him off his stroke with Sophie as a result... Meanwhile, Jeremy faces a tricky dilemma over the love of his life and a potential threesome.

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Sectioning

9.5
November 18, 200530m
3x2

Mark and Sophie are finally beginning to go steady when Sophie is moved away from London for work. Mark is devastated, so Sophie offers phone sex as a solution, which Mark nervously accepts. Meanwhile, Jeremy is forced to consider getting an old friend sectioned.

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Shrooming

10.0
November 25, 200530m
3x3

Jeremy plans to throw a secret magic mushroom party in the flat, where he hopes to seduce his ex, Big Suze. But when Mark suddenly comes home from work with gastric flu, Jeremy's plans go to pieces.

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Sistering

7.3
December 2, 2005
3x4

Mark's plans for an enjoyable and productive week off work go out the window when his sister comes to stay. Jeremy clearly has the hots for her, and when Mark warns him to back off, Jeremy just wants her more...

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Jurying

9.5
December 9, 2005
3x5

Jeremy gets called for jury service but soon complicates things by falling for the defendant. Elsewhere, Mark & Sophie go clubbing.

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Quantocking

10.0
Season Finale
December 16, 2005
3x6

Mark worries he and Sophie are drifting apart and proposes. Elsewhere Super-Hans decides to give up drugs, and Jeremy once again gets intimate with past love Big Suze.

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Sophie's Parents

7.0
April 13, 2007
4x1

Mark continues to dread the impending doom of his wedding day, still questioning his actions from the previous season. Both Mark and Jeremy meet Sophie's parents and brother- leading to disaster with arson, sex with a parent and drunken arguments.

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Conference

6.7
April 20, 2007
4x2

Johnson returns, immediately taking a shine to Big Suze, proposing a deal involving her to Jeremy. Mark is caught up in Johnson's "Project Zeus" with his reputation at the workplace hanging in the balance. Geoff makes his first appearance of the season, and Sophie spends some alone time with Jeremy in the hotel room.

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Gym

9.5
April 27, 2007
4x3

In order to avoid spending time with Sophie, Mark gets a gym membership. Whilst there he discovers that Jeremy's ex-wife Nancy is working there. Mark tells Jeremy who then becomes desperate to get back together with her. He decides to take a job as a cleaner at the gym and sets about stopping her from dating Mark's personal trainer Matt.

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Handyman

9.5
May 4, 2007
4x4

Jeremy meets his hero, techno musician Russell "The Orgazoid". He ends up working as his handyman, which leads Mark to become suspicious, as it seems that Jeremy's job consists of making smoothies for him. Meanwhile Mark meets Sally at his school reunion, one the few girls who actually ever liked him. It turns out that she has married one of Mark's childhood tormentors, Foz. Mark decides to try and seduce Sally whilst Sophie is away on a business trip.

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Holiday

10.0
May 11, 2007
4x5

Jeremy takes Mark on a stag weekend, with a rented canal boat. There, they meet two sisters, Aurora and Lucy, and their father. Jeremy falls in love with Aurora, whilst Lucy becomes sexually attracted to Mark. The father offers Mark a job in India, a way out of his impending marriage to Sophie, whilst Jeremy accidentally kills, and then eats a bit of Aurora's dog.

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Wedding

10.0
Season Finale
May 18, 2007
4x6

It's Mark's wedding day. He is torn about whether he should go through with it or not. Jeremy discourages him but Mark continues. On the way to the reception, Sophie breaks down and runs away. Jeremy comforts Mark as the 'El Dude Brothers' are reunited.

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Burgling

10.0
May 2, 2008
5x1

It's not so long since Mark's new bride Sophie stumbled from the car, looking in appalled fascination at her husband of ten minutes and sobbed, "He's horrible!" As we return for the fifth series of this engagingly filthy comedy, Mark (David Mitchell) is getting drunk and maudlin on wedding champagne as his flatmate Jeremy (Robert Webb) urges him to go out on a double-date: "Beggars can't be choosers, she's an actual woman." Mark - remember, this is a man who once based his romantic strategy on the Siege of Stalingrad - arms himself with a copy of the Friends of the British Museum magazine and goes forth again to search for love.

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Spin War

9.5
May 9, 2008
5x2

Mark and Sophie return to work, while Jeremy renews his acquaintance with the depraved Super Hans, in yet another filthy, funny episode.

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Jeremy's Broke

9.5
May 16, 2008
5x3

Jeremy finally runs out of money and finds himself on a downward spiral of hunger, homelessness and criminality. Meanwhile Mark needs to find a girlfriend before his birthday party.

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Jeremy's Mummy

10.0
May 23, 2008
5x4

Jeremy's tortured relationship with his very sweet mother comes under the spotlight. It emerges that Jez has been living off handouts from his mum for years and now he's in line for half of her £40,000 bequest from an aunt. Jeremy's need to self destruct kicks in immediately, as does Mark's inability to stop his excruciating attempts to ingratiate himself with any mature grown-up. He adores Jeremy's mum and hero-worships her Scots Guardsman boyfriend.

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Jeremy's Manager

9.0
May 30, 2008
5x5

Jeremy and Super Hans get a band manager and play a Christian rock festival. Mark comes along as their roadie, and learns how to have sex properly for the first time in his life.

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Mark's Women

10.0
Season Finale
June 6, 2008
5x6

Mark gets into online gaming and live role play with Dobby and wonders whether she may be The One. Meanwhile, Mark and Sophie finally sort out their annulment. Jeremy joins a cult.

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Jeremy at JLB

10.0
September 18, 2009
6x1

Newly promoted Mark decides to enjoy his additional power and wealth by splashing out on a boiler, a 'creamy elephant' sofa and by finding Jeremy a job in the office. Things are also looking promising for Mark in his pursuit of Dobby, the company IT girl. However, a routine fire drill puts his plans into total disarray.

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The Test

10.0
September 25, 2009
6x2

Mark makes a final play for Dobby, the object of his desires. Meanwhile, Jeremy meets a new love, Russian émigré Elena. Both guys are determined to impress, but one of them is an expectant father. And when the pregnant Sophie spills the beans, both Mark and Jeremy's worlds change forever.

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Jeremy in Love

9.5
October 2, 2009
6x3

Jeremy realises that he's in love with Elena and decides to be generally less selfish to win her affection. He also thinks it might be a good idea to tell her he loves her, but Mark isn't so sure...

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The Affair

7.5
October 9, 2009
6x4

Mark discovers that Jeremy's girlfriend Elena has a guilty secret. But should he tell him when Jez is clearly so happy? In addition to this, Alan Johnson offers Mark the chance to go into business with him. Mark, while reassuring himself that this is his dream offer, begins to see Johnson in a new light. Big Suze inadvertently brings Mark and Jeremy's problems to a head

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The Party

10.0
October 16, 2009
6x5

As a last desperate hurrah before the baby arrives, Mark and Jeremy decide to throw a party. Mark sees it as his final opportunity to reignite his relationship with Dobby, while Jeremy imagines it's a chance to make Elena insanely jealous. But as the evening proceeds, it all becomes a bit of an emotional roller-coaster.

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Das Boot

7.8
Season Finale
October 23, 2009
6x6

Time is running out for Jeremy as Elena and Gail's marriage is imminent. However, he thinks there may be a way to get Gail off the scene and win Elena back. Meanwhile Mark, although conflicted about becoming a father, is worried that Jeff is becoming a potential rival dad. He decides that he's going to learn to drive so that he can take Sophie to the hospital when the baby arrives. Sophie is delighted, but learning to drive doesn't prove that easy.

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St Hospital's

10.0
November 26, 2010
7x1

Mark and Jeremy are at the hospital awaiting the birth of Mark's baby. Sophie is determined to have a natural birth and doesn't want Mark to transfer any of his anxiety to the baby. Meanwhile, Jeremy is convinced he will never get over losing Elena, until he meets Zahra, whose boyfriend is in a coma.

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Man Jam

9.5
December 3, 2010
7x2

Dobby, the object of Mark's desires, is now dating a graphic designer named Simon. Both Gerrard and Mark are determined to win her affections. Ben offers Jeremy the ideal job as head of development for his music web site.

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A Beautiful Mind

9.5
December 10, 2010
7x3

Jeremy holds a book group at the flat in an effort to try and impress Zahra but apart from Mr Nice, Jeremy has never read a book. Mark is concerned by not being able to satisfy Dobby's sexual needs and decides to get some help for the problem.

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