Kris Marshall as Nick Harper
Ben gets angry when Janey tells him she is seeing another dentist, the Australian Mel Fraser, as Ben never gets round to seeing them. Ben soon discovers that Susan has also seen Mel, causing them to argue. They then have to reassure Michael that they are not going to divorce. Meanwhile Janey, who had taken an instant liking to Mel, says she will not see him again after he treated her like a child. Nick, meanwhile, meets Isabelle, a French swimwear model, on the Internet. Ben bets him £50 she is not who she says she is and so Nick invites her round. Michael rebels by buying himself a rabbit called Hannibal.Read More
Michael gets bullied at school by Jason Hodder, and when Ben and Susan find out, Michael calls Susan a "control freak", which means Ben is forced to try and deal with it. However, when it gets worse, she invites Hodder's parents around to discuss the problem. Meanwhile, Nick tries to become a dotcom millionaire and Janey wants a tattoo.Read More
When Brigitte sets Janey up on a date with the son of Lord Whitten, She is over the moon because ""he's absolutely gorgeous"". Ben returns home to find that Nick has become an artist (!) and Susan has booked him tickets to the opera...to see Don Giovanni to be exact. Until listening to a tape of it, Ben doesn't want to go!
When Janey tells Ben and Susan that young Whitten tried to assault her, Ben gets revenge by being less than compassionate when Lord Whitten's son needs dental work the next day...is he making a mistake?...Read More
For Susan's 40th birthday, Ben...or rather Janey...decides that he and Susan should go away for the weekend. They decide to go to a hotel they went to 20 years ago. There, they encounted a rather rampant old couple who ...put nicely...liked to occasionally swap partners!
Meanwhile, Michael charges Janey and Nick £10 an hour to stay home alone.Read More
When Susan worries about the rising crime rate, she insists that the family get a new alarm system - much to Ben's annoyance. Despite what Mitch, the salesman, says, Ben decides to opt for the cheapest system on offer...He'll regret his choice when the alarm just won't stop ringing!!
Meanwhile, Nick decides to become a stripper while Brigitte insists on moving the furniture Ben's surgery around.Read More
Ben insults Mrs Dudley, yet another of his disgruntled patients, at his surgery and also chats to Father Connolly about death.
When he gets home, he has more death to talk about as Nick's new girlfriend, Emily, tries to sell him life insurance and as Susan tells him that one of her tourists died in Madame Tussauds.Read More
While Susan is clearing out everyone's old clothes for charity (mainly Ben's!), Michael worries about what to do on a date...and gets advice from Nick!
Janey defies Susan and buys new jeans that cost £98 and Brigitte decides to 'align Ben's surgery with Mother nature' by playing Whalesong!Read More
When Susan finds Viagra, She wonders why Nick has it. Later though, Ben gets ill and has to go to the hospital where he's told he has hypertension...but not before he admits to taking the Viagra even though the hypertension wasn't caused by Viagra!
Susan allows her yoga teacher to hold the classes in their house, Nick gives Ben mouth to mouth when he thinks he's having a heart attack and Brigitte is her usual self at the surgery.Read More
Ben has a new assistant but doesnt like him! Susan suggests that Nick could be his new assistant...Ben laughs so much that it's decided that Susan will give Nick a job! He does a good job...except for taking the tour group to the pub, getting arrested and taking them for a guided tour of the house! Ben gets a new assistant called Ramon. Meanwhile, Ben discovers that Janey excellent grades are down to the fact that she has several boyfriends...one for each subject, as well as 'stupid Brian'! By the way, Ramon was Nick in disguise.Read More
When Susan tells Ben that she might be pregnant, He replies ""But I don't like the children we've allready got!"". She suggests he thinks about it. The next day, while listening to Trudy, his new assistant, talk baby talk to her boyfriend on the phone, he upsets a pregnant patient by saying how terrible children and teenagers are! When everyone finds out about Susan's secret, she breaks the news that she isn't in fact pregnant...much to Ben glee. Susan thinks Ben has had a vasectomy, but has he? Also, Nick delights Ben by telling him he's a 'Bad father'.Read More
Ben has a new assistant who was herself dumped by her dentist husband who run off with his wn young assistant. Ben and Susan go to Oxford. When Janey has a party to celebrate getting an A in French, the neighbours complain about a man urinating out of a window...who could that be?!Read More
Ben's Aunt Margaret has died and with Susan in bed with the flu, he has to take one of the kids, he first tries to persuade Michael, and then Janey, to go to Leeds to the funeral with him. They refuse, but Nick asks to come instead. Arriving at the hotel, it seems Ben has brought death on holiday with him, with body bags being taken out of the hotel and then the remains of a crime scene in his bedroom. Janey gives some pills to Susan which she got off stupid Brian and persuades her to take them… they seem to have a positive effect, but arriving at the hotel, Susan finds Nick’s date in bed with him and Ben, and to make matters worse, the pills start to have a strange effect on Susan at the funeral.Read More
Ben gets a new patient, Mr Smith from the mob! Ben keeps getting unwanted presents from them like, tires, meat and a watch, he tells Mr smith that he doesn't want the presents and Mr Smith tells him to give the watch back. The only problem is, Susan has found the watch and thinks it's for her, Ben goes and buys a new watch to give to Mr Smith only to find that the 1st was a fake and he'd just wasted a lot of money! Then Susan finds out that her watch is fake so Ben has to buy yet another watch to keep her happy!Read More
Ben buys a bench to represent the Harper name. While trying to photograph his beautiful bench, two prostitutes take up residence on it and Ben offers them money to go away. The resulting photograph (on a timer) captures Ben in a compromising position and appears in the paper the next morning.Read More
Ben meets an old school friend who is now a millionaire. After being told by him about the wonders of the stock market, he and Susan decide to invest a large amount of money. Things go well at first but Ben's refusal to sell up while they're ahead costs them the lot!Read More
Janey's off to University...and Ben couldn't be happier! - just think what he can do with her room? Although Susan isn't so happy to see Janey go, she too has plans for her room. Also, Nick gets a job in a supermarket and lands the Harper's with 100s of tins of tuna, and lands Ben with a criminal record!...Read More
Susan finds a letter on Micheal's desk inviting her and Ben to a school auction - Michael doesn't want them to go because he thinks his parents are too embarrassing. Ben also says no but Susan goes and so forces Ben to! At the auction susan bids for nearly everything and one of the things are a free couple's therepy session. Also, Ben despairs when a patient with very bad breath bids for free dental treatment in his surgery!Read More
Susan, still missing Janey, decides that she needs some female company and so invites Abi, the daughter of a hated cousin of Ben's, to dinner. Ben, as usual, is against her idea. Abi turns out to be the most accident-prone, clumsy person you could meet...qualities that make her someone who Ben would like to never see again: ...He'll just have to get used to her because Susan invites her to come to live with them! Also, Nick decides to become a magician - just where did Ben's favourite white jacket and watch go!?Read More
After being ushered away from the university by Janey and her two male friends, Susan and Ben decide to book into a local hotel under fake names and pretend to meet eachother again as strangers. As you'd expect, it all went wrong when Ben went into the wrong room! Also, Abbi's new boyfriend had michael to contend with!Read More
The Harpers experience internal competition regarding a nativity play when both Nick and Susan audition for parts - Who will get a leading part and who will be a shepherd?! Also Ben is suffering from a severe toothache but is reluctant to put his trust in any other dentist.Read More
Michael has got his eye on a lovely girl in his class, but his mother Susan doesn't approve of his choice. She is even less pleased when she finds a joint in his super-secret sock drawer.
Before she and Ben confront him with their evidence, they decide to try a new way parenting, a more open approach. So they smoke the joint themselves.
In the middle of the night, Susan quickly sees the error of their ways: how can she accuse Michael of smoking pot if all the evidence is gone?Read More
When Susan, much to Janey's disgust, comes to visit her in University, Ben plans (and looks forward to) a golfing weeekend. As you'd imagine, He, Susan, Janey...and the poor university student in the showers... get more than they bargained for, especially when Nick decides to become a female impersonator who seems to take his act a bit too seriously! Also, Nick finds out how much pain is involved while waxing his legs!!Read More
When Nick wins an old car in a poker game, he wants to use it for parts but Ben tries his best to restore it to it's former glory...sadly with little success. Will he and Susan ever get to Dorset for their anniversary weekend away? Meanwhile, Abi finds Michael in her room and has some fun teasing him.Read More
Ben is annoyed when he discovers that his family have forgotten his birthday, but has slightly more to worry about when Janey arrives with her 'lesbian girlfriend', Katie! Is Janey really gay or has she got an ulterior motive? Also, Nick's new job involves dressing up as a gorilla and Michael seemed a little bit too interested in Katie's lifestyle...!Read More
When Janey comes home for Christmas, she's pregnant and Susan wants to know who the father is. However, Janey refuses to tell her, but does tell Ben, who then lies to Susan about the father. Meanwhile, Nick starts a Christmas tree business and then invites round Mr Bradley (Trevor Peacock), an "old person", for Christmas Day. Also, when Susan cooks the turkey with chocolate and raisins, everyone decides they are vegetarians.Read More
Ben, Susan, Nick and Michael are on the tube after doing some Christmas shopping, and due to signalling problems the train cannot move. Michael gets a girlfriend called Claire (Sydney Stevenson), Nick makes money by selling bottled water and Susan starts decorating the carriage. Abi, Roger, and an Albanian man (Samuel Gough) are busking as a Romanian folk band, while Nick brings Richard Whiteley to see Ben and Susan. However, when the problem is fixed, the driver (Nigel Lindsay) refuses to move on until Susan, who was rude to him, apologises. Meanwhile, Ben, dying for a drink, tries to steal the drunk man’s booze whilst everyone in the carriage is asleep.Read More
Ben becomes jealous of Roger winning a £20 gift voucher on the Times Crossword puzzle and tries to prove to himself that he can do crosswords as quick as Roger but Susan demands Ben's full attention and support after she decides to run for the recently open post for Council to try and change to world by ridding it of Dog Poo. Michael meanwhile has got a new pregnant verminous spider - Nicola who has mysteriously disappeared from his bedroom!Read More
The prospect of imminent death often concentrates the mind and the prospect of Ben's is no exception. After visiting 4 different websites, Ben is now convinced he has just a year left to live and decides to write his will with the secondary purpose of trying to get his children to love (or just notice) him. Susan meanwhile organises Ben's funeral, not helped by Nick taking a job at the undertakers.Read More
Susan feels that she doesn't have enough time to do the housework while holding down her job, therefore decides to interview as many cleaners as possible to find the correct one. She then decides on Martha who not only does the cleaning but does the cooking as well and the rest of the family enjoy it. However as a result Susan starts to feel obsolete and tries to get rid of her by sabotaging the house and eating Ben's mint chocolate sweet left on his pillow.
Meanwhile Michael is trying to get a date with a girl at school who loves football by learning everything about football as possible (much to Ben's delight as this is the only subject he knows more than Michael about) and Abi is trying to get a job at a library by learning every single word in the dictionary!Read More
Ben buys Susan the 33 DVD Boxset of Inspector Morse and then tells her of his rich patient who confesses to killing his wife while he was being sedated.
Susan then tries to figure out the mystery behind Mr Addis and his wife while in the meantime Michael has another new girlfriend and she tries to figure out everything about it, but Michael isn't too keen on Susan finding out.Read More
Susan is increasingly annoyed at Ben's consistent snoring while she is trying to get to sleep and suggests 'alternative' ways to deal with the ordeal, however it doesn't seem to work and leads to a separation of beds. Both Ben and Susan then have 'perfect' freedom in the lives because of this however Abi has seen this before, having witnessed 5 separations involving her dad, she feels that Ben and Susan are heading for divorced and is convinced she is the case of all family breakups.
Meanwhile Janey has started her own shopping business from her room while her boiler is being fixed and is becoming an 'assistant shopper' for both Abi and Michael.Read More
A filmcrew comes to town to film a new film which contains many famous british actors. Ben and Roger fight to perform surgery on the British Heartthrob who wants a 'normal classic' dentist. This leads to Roger geting tickets to the stars fashion perade and Janey finds a way to minipulate Roger to become his 'date for the night' just to mingle with the stars. Michael finds a way to make money out of the film crew by charging them extorsionate amounts of money to use the toilet.
Meanwhile, Susan's tourist firm is being taken over by another company and she gets fired, she then becomes determined to take the exam, pass, then quit on the high ground.Read More
After finishing their Christmas Dinner the Harpers decide to relax and laugh at the misery Nick is apparently having in a jungle without food and water (and naturally needs money). Janey then comes home with her new fiancÃ½, Ches, (played by Danny Webb) who turns out to be a shock - older than Ben!
Both Janey and Ches plan the wedding and Ben is upset that Janey no longer requires his money but he still has to do a Father of the Bride speech while Susan is trying to plan everything (and stop the wedding at the same time).
Meanwhile Michael is having Girlfriend troubles and initially tries to stop her comming to the wedding but after seeing what fun it would be (and he doesn't want to be Janey's page boy) he invites Molly (played by Verity-Jane Dearsley) along to see the 'fun' (and hopes she'll break up with him).Read More
Roger is full of Christmas cheer, but as you might expect, Ben isn't. In fact his only Christmas tradition is being grumpy throughout the yuletide period.
This year he is particularly irritable because his house is full of people: clowns are auditioning for Kenzo's birthday party on Christmas Eve, Susan's mother is staying, and Nick's friend Alfie has arrived on the doorstep carrying a guitar and a bag of Nick's crusty old socks.
Ben discovers a very expensive ring in Susan's cupboard, which he assumes is for him, despite them agreeing they weren't "doing" presents this year. He panics because all he's got her is an ironing board cover.
Susan seizes Kenzo's birthday party as an opportunity to determine who his father is, and insists that Janey invite him. Janey gets round this by arranging for three respectable male friends to attend. This momentarily seems like defeat for Susan, until she enlists the help of Michael and his home DNA testing kit...
At Kenzo's birthday party, the increasingly dependable Alfie entertains the children with some songs, while 'behind the scenes' Ben struggles to slap some sense back into Roger. As part of Ben's cost-cutting plan, Roger, a self-professed clown enthusiast, has agreed to pose as 'Shingles' the clown instead of hiring the real thing. Unfortunately he has stage fright and then faints after Ben feeds him too much alcohol to calm his nerves.
Drastic measures are required, and so Ben - whose face is already red from a disastrous facial delivered at Abi's department store makeup counter - adopts the clown costume, and Susan becomes his assistant. They almost get away with it.
Ben only went through Abi's beauty routine in order to use her staff discount card to buy Susan an expensive gift: a video camera. But to his dismay, this is precisely the present that his mother in law has got her. He turns to Alfie, who recommends he buy Susan a first edition book by her favourite author.
So Ben buys Susan a gift of equivalent value to the ring he think she's got him - but of course it turns out to be a present from Susan's mother to her three-months-younger 'toyboy'. Susan is very happy. She's less happy when the DNA tests show that none of Janey's guests were Kenzo's father - but she can't win them all.
She takes pity on Alfie and invites him to stay in Nick's old room.Read More
Ben is not looking forward to Christmas.
This year, he tries to convince Susan of a mystery illness in an effort to escape the entire festive season.
Not convinced by Ben's litany of pains, hot flushes and palpitations, Susan soon calls his bluff and drags him to the doctors, only for Ben to be admitted into hospital.
Michael and Alfie make the most of an empty house in the mean time, and Janey learns that it's tough being a mum.Read More
Ben thinks all his Christmases have come at once, when Susan declares that this year there will be no tree, no decorations and most importantly no family.
Susan whisks Ben away to a relaxing country retreat where the rest of the family can't ruin his festivity free day.
With the rest of the family at a safe distance away, Ben settles into the hotel and begins the relaxing Christmas he's always dreamed of.
His fantasy, however, is shattered when the family arrive to surprise him, bringing with them his crazed stalker, Crystal...
Abi has just qualified as a massage therapist and decides to pay for her and Roger's room by working in the hotel spa. When she turns up for an appointment, she is horrified to discover who is lying on her table – with little more than a towel covering his modesty.
Nick's friend Alfie, meanwhile, is in charge of "babysitting" his Uncle, who has a habit of wandering off, it's not long before Alfie despairs and turns up at the hotel for support.
Despite Susan's insistence on making it a "family" only Christmas, Michael manages to smuggle his new girlfriend into his room and Janey surprises everyone by introducing a new addition to the family.
With the Harpers all under one roof, will Ben or Susan manage to have the Christmas they dreamt of – especially when Crystal's angry, jailbird boyfriend turns up?Read More
It's December 2039 and the Harpers gather together to celebrate Christmas. Thirty years in the future, the family's appearance may have changed somewhat but their love/hate relationships are still very much alive. Ben is in now in his eighties, a little slower than he used to be but still as grumpy as ever and causing grief for Susan – who, thanks to "a little moisturiser", hasn't aged a bit ("a little moisturiser" may also be an injoke to her guest appearance in Doctor Who). To say that Janey has gained a little weight is an understatement, as she now weighs in at a whopping 20 stone. Michael, meanwhile, is doing a very bad job of hiding his baldness with an unconvincing wig and, following a disastrous trip to the zoo, Roger is now merely a head in a glass dome. Susan is put out by the fact that grandson Kenzo, now 38 years old, hasn't come to visit the family for Christmas Day. Ben is quick to point out that the Harpers have had some of the worst Christmases ever, and the family are reminded of some of their Christmas disasters. Two years stand out in particular – back when they were all a lot younger, and Janey was a lot lighter, the usual arguments over presents were exacerbated by Susan's fun, new game – the Greed Gift Exchange. But, when Kenzo finally arrives, he points out that the year Uncle Richard came to stay was just as traumatic for him.Read More
When the local council insists that Ben has a disablity problem, they start giving him local cheques in the mail but they do not know that the cheques belong to another Ben Harper. Instead, Ben decides to spend the money on buying Susan expensive shoes and starts to become disabled by fooling a court woman, Rosemary, who nominates him for an award. Meanwhile, Janey and Kenzo give up Janey's teddy and Kenzo's thumb sucking for a bet. Ben soon begins to sink deeper and deeper into his lie, he begins to realise that the truth must come out, but in no way can he predict how the truth is eventually revealed.Read More
Michael is becoming more and more out of control until he comes home drunk one night and blurts out his deepest secret, telling Ben that he's gay. Susan is annoyed that Michael didn't come out to her and for once a supportive Ben outshines Susan's caring nature, but the tables turn when Michael's boyfriend's father goes to the dentist for a check-up. Meanwhile, Janey takes care of an annoying elderly patient, which eventually leads to him dying and leaving Janey his flat, and Michael's boyfriend Scott moves into the Harper residence.Read More
Susan has enlisted the help of older neighbour Martin – whose wife passed away a few years ago – to do odd jobs around the house. Ben's pleased, and starts getting Martin to do even more jobs. Ben and Susan find themselves at the mercy of a cross-dressing-lunatic... all because Susan receives expensive valentine's gifts that she presumes are from Ben, but aren't, so he goes round to confront Martin, and is shocked to discover his neighbour has made a shrine to Susan. Meanwhile, Janey gets hooked on high-sugar energy drinks, and finds herself in Liverpool.Read More
Ben and Susan are enjoying the peace and quiet of having the house all to themselves, but this is soon ruined by an Australian Backpacker called Craig, who turns up at the Harper’s doorstep. Susan immediately invites him into the house, and he starts doing the jobs that Ben’s always put off, much to Ben’s annoyance, who just wants the house to himself and Susan. Things soon take a rather sinister twist for Ben when he realises that Craig may be his son, after a night of ‘fun’ with his Mother. Janey soon takes a liking to the new guest and the pair of them go on a date, much to Ben's dismay, Susan then discovers the truth and it transpires that his brief fling happened when he and Susan were dating.Read More
When Michael returns home from a gay bar drunk, he realises he’s forgotten his phone, but Susan insists that he can’t go back there in his state – he might get stabbed – so she sends Ben instead. However, he soon grabs the attention of Rupert, who’s a little bit too attracted to him, and Ben finds himself getting sent flowers and receiving visits to his house and dental surgery. Only Susan seems to have the power to stop Ben’s apparent stalker, and the truth certainly hurts.Read More
Susan's going away for the weekend, but is concerned that Ben will just lie on the sofa eating junk food, watching TV and drinking beer. He's adamant that he will do no such thing, and that he will eat the fruit, vegetables and other food that she's left for him. Later on, he’s alone in the house, when the police turn up and ask him to be apart of an identity parade. He's very happy to do so, and shows off his moves… but his mood soon drops when he's formally arrested for a mugging! And ends up in a cell with fellow inmates Carl and Terry. On returning home, Ben is enjoying some tranquillity… until two familiar faces turn up on his doorstep, and his weekend soon turns to anything but the fun and relaxing time he set out to have especially when Verity, Carl's wife, turns up.Read More
Janey is due to work, but needs someone to cover for her, because she needs to look after Kenzo and she also wants to keep her job. She asks Michael, who can't because he's too pre-occupied with his split from Scott, then Roger comes round, who's still depressed about Abi. Just wanting some peace, Ben enquires about whether this old man – Harry - has Sky, and when he finds out that he does, he insists that he covers for her. He's quite capable of looking after an old man. Reluctantly, Janey hands over the keys, and his address, but tells Ben that the one thing he mustn't do is let Harry out of his sight.Read More
Whilst playing Santa at Susan's works Christmas party Ben becomes emotionally involved when a little girl asks him to reconcile her mother and grand-father, who have fallen out. He actually succeeds, winning rare praise from Susan for his efforts. The Harpers are less successful, though, when their lavish New year party, with fireworks, a band and food from T.V. chef Ainsley Harriott initially fails to poach guests from nasty neighbour Casey's glitzy annual event. Can recent dental patient Rolf Harris save the night with his presence or will the rocket literally go up? At least Susan and Ben see in the New Year presenting a united front.Read More