When Homer gets a notice from the library that he has a book of classic tales that is years overdue, he finds it on the shelf and reads three stories: The Odyssey (where Homer and his bar buddies try to get home after fighting the Trojans), Joan of Arc (where Lisa leads the French against the English with the help of God), and Hamlet (where Bart tries to kill Moe after Moe kills Homer in order to marry Marge).

After yet another Homer and Marge fight, Homer ends up sharing a condo with two homosexuals - who don't exactly think Homer is straight.

Homer and Marge's bond becomes stronger when they both get drunk on wine, but soon the bond unravels when Homer blames Marge for crashing the car and Marge gets sent to rehab. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa complain to Randall Curtis (a George Lucas-esque science fiction movie director) about his latest film.

Bart gets expelled from school and transfers to a Catholic school, where a hip priest named Father Sean tries to convert Bart and Homer to Catholicism, which worries Marge when she believes that Catholics do not go to the same heaven as Protestants and discovers that Catholic women do not use birth control.

Marge reads Homer's carpentry books and becomes very handy at fixing things. Gender bias keeps the townspeople from accepting a female carpenter, so Marge pretends that Homer does the work. Meanwhile, Bart torments Skinner when he learns the principal has an extreme allergy to peanuts.

Lisa sees poetry in the notes Moe sticks to the walls of his hotel room, so she sends his work to a poetry journal, which publishes it, making Moe the toast of the literary circuit.

A documentary filmmaker who interviewed a group of Springfield schoolchildren 32 years ago has followed up at eight-year intervals to film how their lives have unfolded.

Springfield is the setting for parodies of Charlie Brown, It's the Great Pumpkin and Michael Bay's Transformers as Homer's vote on election day is misread by a renegade machine.

The Simpsons decide to embrace a cheaper, alternate source of energy by erecting a wind turbine in their backyard. But when Homer realizes some of the power is being directed to the local electric company, he decides to remove his home from the grid and becomes completely dependent upon an unreliable source of power. Meanwhile, a storm erupts, trapping a magnificent 150-foot-long blue whale ashore, and Lisa and Homer attempt to help the poor creature.

The family is greeted by folk singer Ewell Freestone when they visit a peach farm, but when Marge goes overboard with peach-inspired dishes, Lisa and Bart try to get rid of the unwanted fruit. Later, Lisa becomes a magician’s apprentice to the legendary Great Raymondo who helps her develop her craft, but a schoolgirl crush clouds her judgment when she is coaxed into revealing the Great Raymondo’s most famous magic trick to his phony archnemesis. But when the rival magician’s act takes a risky turn, the Great Raymondo has one last trick up his sleeve and stages showdown with Ricky Jay, Penn & Teller and David Copperfield, showing them why he is the master of the craft.

When Bart gets his wish for a family vacation, he becomes determined to make it last forever.