Matt Lucas — Writer

Episodes 24

0.0

Pilot

0x1
February 9, 2003

The following synopsis is of the version included on the Little Britain DVD. Broadcast versions may not include all of the following sketches.

• Vicky Pollard's in court charged with shoplifting.

• At the Aberdoon Stook Hoose a couple want to complement the Chef and find out his secrets.

• Latymer Crowe makes his client think of a hoard of marauding buffalo.

• Emily Howard, goes to a swimming pool in Mirkin.

• Mr Mann goes into Roy's Toy Shop.

• The Prime Minister holds a political press conference with some unusual people.

• Latymer wants his client to think of children throwing stones at a pensioner.

• Fat Fighters have a new 13 year old member.

• Sebastian pretends to rescue the PM from a sniper attack.

• Jeremy has a part for Dennis Waterman in a new ITV drama series.

• Love at first sight for Jason as Gary introduces him to his Nan.

• Latymer Crowe sings his client a very loud lullaby

• Daffyd Thomas' gay claim is challanged.

• World Record Attempt for Domino Toppling

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Bath Of Beans

1x1
September 16, 2003

• Vicky is in trouble with her teacher for not handing in her essay.

• Sebastian is jealous of the new Treasury aide.

• Emily Howard goes to a pub.

• Andy insists Lou takes him to the opera.

• Children of Kelsey Grammer School take it in turns to read a novel.

• Gary introduces Jason to his family.

• The pianist wonders if he's still got the plastic bag he brought with him.

• Kenny Craig takes a date to a Chinese restaurant.

• Jeremy Rent has a part for Dennis Waterman in a play of Macbeth.

• At Fat Fighters the buzz word for the day is 'Cravings'!

• Ray McCooney is asked how he makes his soup.

• Lou takes Andy to the swimming pool.

• Daffyd Thomas' 'only gay' title is challenged by Old Ma Evans' new lodger.

• Vicky's done her essay.

• Two Minstrels, listen to anti-minstrel politician.

• World Record Attempt - Most Beans in a Bath.

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Tallest Man

1x2
September 23, 2003

• Daffyd realises his exclusive copy of the Gay Times has been sold and demands to know who too.

• Lou is taking Andy out for dinner. Andy wants to go dressed as a Smurf, against Lou's better judgement.

• Vicky is accused of pushing a young girl into a swimming pool.

• At Kelsey Grammer school the boys are preparing to take a test.

• Dr Lawrence is in his office informing an inspector how the Steven Spielberg institute is run.

• Sebastian walks in while the PM is changing and pounces on him, claiming there's a sniper at the window.

• Back at the institute Dr Lawrence is showing the inspector how Anne likes to look after the garden.

• Back at Kelsey Grammer School the test continues while the teacher does a bit of vacuuming.

• Lou is installing handle bars next to Andy's toilet so he can pull himself onto it when Lou isn't there.

• Dame Sally Markham finishes 'The Lady in White' but it's only seventy-six pages long.

• David Soul is asked to visit a sick child in hospital.

• Marjorie defends Fat Fighters against an 'anonymous' tip off that the whole thing is just a scam.

• Dr. Lawrence continues his tour in the canteen where Ann is doing her best to ruin their meals.

• Jason performs the Heimlich manoeuvre on Gary's Nan... or at least we think that's what it was.

• Back at school, the pupils battle through their test as the teacher sets off three fireworks in the classroom.

• Clive is hoping his wife Liz will be quiet about her past claim to fame while they're at a restauant.

• Les McKeown performs some songs for the sick child and her parents.

• A retired police officer starts teaching driving lessons while still wearing his uniform.

• The record attempters are attempting the world record for tallest man.

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September 30, 2003

• Sebastian reviews the PMs bad press after a recent bi-election.

• Vicky's in a pub trying to buy alcoholic drinks for herself and her mates.

• Lou's taken Andy to the seaside and is trying to buy him an ice cream.

• At Kelsey Grammer school a pupil called 'Thorpe' has been moved down a year.

• Kenny Craig is playing Scrabble with his Mum at the hospital.

• The two Black-and-White Minstrels are trying to find accomadation.

• After an informative debate about the fat content of dust, Marjorie introduces the group to her sister Barbara.

• Back at Kelsey Grammer, there's new addition to the class. from the seventeenth century.

• The Pianist stops his performance to check the time Sainsbury's supermarket shuts.

• Daffyd's bored as he believes there's no social activities for gay people. Myfanwy proves him wrong.

• Lou takes Andy to the video shop.

• Emily Howard is renting out a room.

• Sir Bernard Chumley greets an aspiring young actor - Joe.

• Ray McCooney has a very satisfied customer... well he was.

• Kelsey Grammer school has another new boy... here boy! Fetch!

• Dame Sally tries to finish off a book by extending words of quotes by several letters.

• Denver Mills has been booked to promote Hug-a-Leper week.

• World Record Attempters attempt to eat the most hard boiled eggs.

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October 7, 2003

• Daffyd goes to get a hair cut but his usual Hair Dresser is off.

• Emily Florence is having an X-Ray.

• Lou is about to take Andy home from the pub, Andy insists that he doesn't need to go to the toilet first.

• Dr Lawrence shows, Dr Beagrie how Anne fits perfectly into the job of Librarian.

• Vicky Pollard's in court charged with shoplifting.

• Matthew Waterhouse has a multitude of ideas for a kiss-a-gram agency.

• At Kelsey Grammer school, the teacher asks the pupils some hard maths/history questions.

• Sandra Patterson enters her son Ralph into an audition for a commercial.

• Back at the library, Anne 'processes' a book.

• Des Kaye is stopped from selling his videos and attacking a customer with a crocodile puppet.

• Anne's finished her shift at the library.

• Royal correspondant Peter Andre is sacked from the BBC.

• Lou offers Andy a chocolate.

• At the opera, a man suffers a heart attack. Luckily April and Neville are on hand.

• Ray has some rather fussy American tourists, who keep asking questions, not a good idea when Ray McCooney's concerned.

• Miss Grace is shocked that Dame Sally is actually dictating a story that could actually sell.

• Dennis Waterman seems to have gotten over his 'Write the theme tune, sing the theme tune' stage and actually signs a contract.

• Liz is pushed out of the lime light by a stranger who claims he went to school with Paul McCartney.

• The world record attempters are attempting the most cigarettes smoked at once.

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October 14, 2003

• Vicky Pollard is summoned to the governess' office for biting Jackie Hayes.

• Andy insists Lou buys him a snake.

• The Prime Minister holds a politcal press conference with some unusual people.

• Marjorie expresses her views on liposuction.

• Samantha asks Edward how much he loves her... and gets a very detailed answer.

• At Kelsey Grammer School a young boy has an interview with a new Robot careers advisor.

• Lou takes Andy to the Library.

• As things start to look romantic, Edward asks Samantha to draw the curtains...

• Bernard gets meals on wheels for sister Kitty.

• Peter Andre tries to sneak into a royal garden party.

• Kenny Craig sells videos at a car boot sale.

• Matthew Waterhouse tries to impress a leading theatrical producer

• Daffyd visits the Llandewi Breffi Sexual Health Clinic.

• Denver Mills stands in for Fatima Whitbread at a school.

• Lou takes Andy up many hospital stairs.

• Eilene is comforting her bereaved sister Janet.

• At DIY universe, The new boy Kieran unwittingly asks Des Kaye about the Bubble Twins.

• World Record Attempt for a House of Cards.

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0.0

Smallest Ant

1x6
October 20, 2003

• The Prime Minister is having a meeting with the Chancellor of the Exchequer.

• ITV have want Dennis Waterman to reprise all his roles from Minder.

• In Darkly Noone, Dr Alban diagnoses Vicky as being eight months pregnant.

• At the Annual Police Federation Dinner, Denver Mills has been booked to give an after-dinner speech.

• Lou's taken Andy to the newsagent to pick out a birthday card for his brother Declan.

• Marjorie bumps into Paul and Meera at the supermarket.

• Ray's got the TV Repair man in and tries to give the most crpyitcal explanation of what happened.

• Dr Lawrence has taken Anne home with him.

• Des Kaye bumps into his former boss Robin Dee and Dicky Bubble.

• Lou and Andy look at holiday destinations, Andy insists he wants to go to Helsinki.

• At Kelsey Grammer school, Mr Cleeves reads out some messages.

• Sandra and Ralph Patterson break into the offices of the Royal Shakespeare company.

• Back at Dr Lawrence's home Anne has some creative uses for egg and tuna sandwiches.

• The pianist stops playing when he realises he's forgotten to set his video recorder to tape Room 101.

• Dame Sally adlibs a plot involving a character reciting the entire Bible.

• Matthew Waterhouse gatecrashes a board room meeting with a trolley full of ideas for breakfast cereals.

• It's Maria's funeral, Lou's being as gentle as he can with Andy.

• In a charity shop a lady is asking the store owners if anyone died in various items of colthing.

• Dr Lawrence and the children are playing outside and Anne's busy throwing objects out of an upstairs window.

• Emily Howard's at the seaside having a hard time convincing various people he's a lady.

• The World Record Attempters exhibit the world's smallest ant.

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October 28, 2003

• Vicky Pollard gets a visit from a social worker.

• At Fat Fighters Marjorie and Paul try to forget the night before.

• Lou paints Andy's bedroom red.

• Daffyd's gay night is a success.

• Sir Bernard's sister kitty is dead, well maybe.

• New term at Kelsy Grammar school.

• Ralph Patterson auditions for Bugsy Malone.

• PM and Sebastian discuss the Party Conference speech.

• Jason and Gary visit Gary's Nan, there is then toe sucking.

• World record attempters make largest mince pie.

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November 4, 2003

• Emily Howard helps to fix an ice cream van.

• Daffyd discovers Myfanwy's Lesbonic secret.

• Vicky Pollard gives a speech to her ex-school mates.

• Lou and Andy have a bonfire.

• Boris babysits.

• Kelsey Grammer School have a crips exam.

• At Ye Olde Hotel Ray's tax payments are overdue.

• Dame Sally gets to Miss Grace type the Radio.

• At Fat Fighters, Mrs Harrison from Head Office attends and Marjorie is sacked.

• Concert pianist stops to read a text message.

• Michael meets the Italian Prime Minister.

• World Record Attempters go for Most people in a Mini.

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0.0

Episode 1

2x1
October 19, 2004

• Vicky Pollard stealing Pic'n'Mix sweets.

• Emily and Florence cycle and stop off at a tea shop.

• Bubbles is followed around the health spa by the manager, who wants to know when she is going to pay her bill.

• Andy watches "The Price is Right" Lou hears "Andy Pipkin, come on down!".

• Judy and Maggie start to judge the homemade jams on hearing that it was made by a lady who ran off with a school mistress throws it back up.

• Daffyd comes out to his parents.

• Marjorie Dawes gets a Visit from Vanessa Feltz.

• Mr Mann enters Roy's dating agency, and requests a woman with the name of Linda Williams

• Lou and Andy take a stroll in the park, where a group of teenagers taunt them.

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Episode 2

2x2
October 26, 2004

• Emily and Florance try to buy wedding dresses.

• Sebastian pulls faces at the US President's aide.

• Bubbles spends a little too long on the UV bed.

• Lou takes Andy to meet his new Polish girlfriend Annia.

• Linda is helps Joanna Harding get an extension on her essay.

• Ann is working at a TenPin Bowling arena.

• Marjorie is disgusted that Paul and Pat have started going out together.

• Daffyd opens a Gay and Lesbian stall at the village fete.

• Linda helps Kenneth Lou get the rest of the week off.

• Harvey and Jane's parents meet for the first time at a public restaurant.

• At the bank a boy wants to open a Junior account.

• Vicky Pollard's in the park, hitting on Bethany's boyfriend

• Dennis Waterman is given a role as Captain Birdseye.

• Linda once again insults a student - this time it's a dwarf.

• Mr Mann goes into Roys video shop.

• Maggie samples a volevont made from a recipe by Ainsley Harriot.

• Finally Lou takes Andy to the countryside.

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Episode 3

2x3
November 2, 2004

• Vicky's determined to get herself thrown off a bus.

• Lou takes Andy to an ice skating rink.

• Viv tries to give an accurate description of some robbers.

• Where are they now? Mr T. is spotted in a gymnasium.

• Emily can't resist the temptation to join in on a children's game of football.

• Meera has won the lottery and Marjorie is being surprisingly nice to her...

• A visit from the PM's former aide sends Sebastian into a jealous frenzy.

• Kenny Craig hypnotises his Mum into letting him watch ThunderCats.

• Dr. Lawrance is showing Dr. Beagly how Anne likes to feed the ducks.

• Mr. Mann pops into Roy's card shop.

• PCs Bryce and Rawlingson have some sad news to depart.

• Dennis Waterman gets a guest appearance in Never Mind the Buzzcocks.

• PCs Bryce and Rawlingson still have some sad news to depart.

• Daffyd is shocked to discover his brother is gay.

• Someone's blocked Lou's van in at a supermarket car park and Andy is not going to miss My Hero for anything...

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Episode 4

2x4
November 9, 2004

• Vicky pretends she witnessed a Jewellery robbery.

• Judy and Maggie sample mince pies made by two homosexual members of the choir.

• A newsagent puts a customer off buying a magazine.

• At a restaurant in Throttle the posh gentleman orders posh menu items... and a Double Decker.

• Emily and Florance go to the ballet.

• Lou dresses Andy up as baby Jesus.

• Dr. Lawrance has managed to get Ann a part in a play.

• Marjorie takes her group to a restaurant for a Christmas meal.

• Daffyd protests against the local library stating there aren't any 'gay' books.

• Back at the Throttle restaurant another order posh menu items...a Lion bar and a Pepperami.

• The Prime Minister's wants Sebastian to announce that his wife is pregnant.

• At the bank a man and a women want a Mortgage.

• Jane, Harvey and his family are discussing the wedding arrangements.

• Kenny Craig damages another car in a car park.

• Moanwheel back in a Throttle Restaurant the waiter is asked for a bag of Monster Munch and Um Bongo to drink.

• Mr. Mann pops into Roy's book shop.

• Bubbles DeVere has a shoking way of paying for her spa treatment.

• Andy manages to fall out of his wheelchair and into a tree.

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Episode 5

2x5
November 16, 2004

• Lou takes Andy Ten Pin Bowling.

• Vicky tries to get into a Blazin' Squad concert.

• Emily and Florance have a go at playing Tennis.

• A lady confesses, to a psychiatrist, she's seeing someone behind her husband's back.

• Fat Fighters have brought out a range of low calorie treats.

• A lady mistakes builders working on her house for dogs.

• Viv Tudor has been requested to attend an identity parade.

• The Prime Minister goes on Newsnight.

• The gossip spreads quickly when a man confesses (in confidence) he's started going to prostitutes...

• Kenny Craig has spent the night with his girlfriend.

• The posh gentleman orders more obscure items from the menu... and a buttered Yorkie.

• Doug has some rather bizarre advice for his drug rehab class.

• Dr Lawrence shows Dr. Beagrie what a good artist Anne is.

• Andrew Lloyd Webber wants Dennis to play the lead role in a play he's written.

• Carol is invited to a leaving party for one of her colleagues.

• Daffyd is asked to be referee adoption papers for Rhiannon and Myfanwy.

• Andy's decided he wants Lou to take him to France.

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Episode 6

2x6
November 23, 2004

• Lou takes Andy on a blind date.

• Vicky goes out with Jermaine and turns Jamaican.

• Rachel shows Nicola a rather unusual Polaroid.

• Harlem send Reverend Jesse King to take an Anglican church service. Hallelujah, Praise the lord!

• Marjorie's determined to ruin Paul and Pat's engagement party.

• Kenny Craig hypnotises his audience into believing they're being entertained.

• Daffyd finally realises there's no one in Llandawi Breffi who isn't gay.

• Back at the Hypnotist show Kenny's finished his book.

• Rachel shows Nicola another strange Polaroid.

• As Harvey and Jane get married, the part with the vows takes an unusual turn.

• Dennis Waterman gets a part in Star Wars.

• Bubbles hits on the owner of the Health Spa.

• Mr Mann walks into a Roy's record shop.

• Rachel has another unusual Polaroid to show Nicola.

• Judy and Maggie sample some Gingerbread men made by an Asian girl.

• At No.10 The PM is celebrating another election victory.

• Lou takes Andy to the popular coastal town of Sphincter-on-sea.

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March 11, 2005

Comic Relief Special

• The Chief Admiral invites the Prime Minister to see one of the Navy's ships to judge the condition of the defence forces, but Sebastian insinuates he has alteria motives.

• "Munwheel in Throttle, a lunch order is being taken". A posh gentlemen orders Hubba Bubba (bubblegum).

• Whilst sitting on the toilet, Andy issues Lou with his toughest challange yet. He wants Lou to invite George Michael(s) to his birthday dinner. Lou, true to character, honours his request, but will Andy be pleased?

• Robbie Williams walks into what he thinks is a branch of Burton's, quickly finding out it's under new management, Robbie gets the Emily and Florance treatment.

• The bank staff are arranging a fun run for Comic Relief, Carol checks with the computer to see if she'll be involved.

• Judy and Maggie attend a fete and sample some scones made by Baloo - an African lady.

• Trisha - 'Families Reunited'. Tempers run high as Vicky is reunited with her father Ken.

• Dennis Waterman gets a part in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, of course all the music's already written.

• Daffyd turns reporter and asks Sir Elton John a series of very probing questions for The Llandewi Breffi Gazette.

• Lou takes Andy to an athletics track to do some training for the fun run but is completely unaware that Andy is doing something far more spectacular behind his back...

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0.0

Episode 1

3x1
November 17, 2005

• Bubbles bumps into her ex-husband and his new wife at the health spa.

• Lou and Andy visit an aquarium

• Dudley's new Thai bride, Ting Tong, arrives, but she is not what he was expecting.

• Vicky and her gang are challenged to a dance-off.

• Mrs Emery meets an old friend at the supermarket

• Emily Howard has a 'small' facial hair problem

• Sir Norman Fry reveals a personal secret on TV.

• Carol Beer starts work in a travel agents

• Dafydd starts his new job as a rent boy.

• Anne takes part on Stars in Their Eyes

• Linda has a meeting with a bald student.

• Marjorie has had an accident with her tanning cream.

• Sebastian discovers the PM's plan about Iran - what will he do?

• Lou and Andy visit an airshow - but where's Andy got to?

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Episode 2

3x2
November 24, 2005

• Andy tries his luck at a TV phone-in competition.

• Mrs. Emery visits the post office.

• Vicky starts her new job working on an adult chat line.

• Dudley catches Ting-Tong doing something unlady-like in the toilet.

• After another fight with bubbles, Diseree loses more than her towel.

• Linda assists with a course change for a female student with a slight facial hair problem.

• Majorie becomes jealous when her new boyfriend starts being friendly with Tanya.

• Daffyd introduces Myfanwy to his new... girlfriend?

• Mr. Mann is looking to buy a painting of a disappointed horse.

• Don takes Pat to an Indian restaurant, where the food has an unusual effect on him.

• Maggie is recovering well from a kidney transplant, until she's given the name of the doner.

• Sebastian serenades the PM in the Houses of Paliament

• Andy decides to make a trip along the River Thames slightly more interesting.

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Episode 3

3x3
December 1, 2005

• Vicky has some scandal to sell to the press.

• Andy wants breasts, but a magazine won't suffice.

• Anne has a new job as a pianist in a posh restaurant.

• An elderly couple visit Carol's travel agent to book a cruise.

• A new revelation for Dudley, Ting Tong not from Pong Pong.

• Sir Norman Fry explains away being caught in a compromising position in a public toilet.

• Marjorie gets a bit too starstruck when Fat Fighters gets a celebrity new member

• Letty, a woman obsessed by pretend frogs, reacts unexpectedly to being given a real frog.

• Diseree catches Bubbles giving Roman a facial, but was he set up?

• Orville the duck is spotted in a supermarket trying to keep a low profile.

• Don unwisely orders another spicy meal.

• Sebastian reacts badly to a book revealing the PM has a few skeletons in his cupboard

• An elderly couple make a donation to the Donkey hospice

• Maggie meets Judy's daughter's coloured boyfriend

• Lou is stopped by the police for speeding.

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Episode 4

3x4
December 8, 2005

• Mrs Emery sees someone she recognises in a Library.

• Emily hits the town with Florence to celebrate her hen night.

• Dudley is unimpressed by the arrival of Ting Tong's mother.

• Roman reveals to Bubbles the reason he left her was because she was too skinny.

• An old man is nearing his end but not as quickly as he thought he would.

• Someone wants to travel to the island featured in Captain Corelli's Mandolin... computer says no.

• Pat and Paul announce that they are going to have a baby. Marjorie tries to be creative with baby names.

• Sid Pegg calls an urgent Neighbourhood Watch meeting about their new enemy - Gypsies.

• Daffyd is scouting for voters for his new political 'Gay Rights For Gays' party

• Linda describes an Indian student to Martin.

• Mr Mann visits Roy's paper shop to buy a magazine about feet problems.

• Sebastian is shocked to discover the PM has grown a mustache.

• Maggie's Old English Sheepdog takes a familiar disliking to a Chinese Shi-tzu.

• Andy takes matters into his own hands when Lou refuses to rescue his Frisbee from an electricity pylon.

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0.0

Episode 5

3x5
December 15, 2005

• Lou has finished cementing the new patio at Andy's house.

• A couple need travel insurance for their holiday... computer says no.

• A man and wife are going out, leaving their son in the 'experienced' care of a certain chav babysitter.

• Linda 'helps' a student with a mole problem.

• Sir Norman Fry reveals an embarrassing incident involving two men and a glacé cherry.

• Marjorie has asked the FatFighters to bring in a photo of each of them, not looking their best, for 'inspiration'.

• The man and wife check up on Vicky.

• At a computer shop a clerk seeks technical advice from a horse, init

• Daffyd explains to his mother why he cant get a job.

• At another 'emergency' meeting of neighbour watch, Sid demonstrates what to do if a gang of yobs attacks you in your home.

• Mr Mann visits Roy's fancy dress shop.

• Lou and Andy visit a rugby match.

• Sebastian's being paranoid about the PM spending time with Gregory... or is he?

• Emily Howard introduces a fellow young mother to her 'Baby Flo'.

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Episode 6

3x6
December 24, 2005

• Vicky Pollard demands billions from her newsagent after claiming she's won the lottery.

• As Roman and Desiree leave the spa, Bubbles makes one last effort to win him back.

• Carol gets a shock - computer says yes!

• Lou returns to the Isle of Wright following his mum's death. Andy is not pleased by the temporary carer Lou has arranged for him.

• Emily discovers Florence (Fred) is leaving Old Haven. • Linda is visited by a big, black man.

• Andy's new helper wants to know about Andy's feeling in his legs - by hitting it with a brass object.

• Mrs Emery visits the doctor with knee problems.

• Marjorie's FatFighters finally take a stand against her.

• Linda gets a protest visit from all the students she has insulted.

• Andy's helper finds alternative 'entertainment' for Andy.

• Daffyd prepares to leave the village for a new life in London.

• Anne is entering the Christmas spirit - which Dr Beagrie discovers the hard way.

• Dudley discovers Ting Tong has turned his house into a Thai restaurant.

• Sebastian is heartbroken - the PM has resigned.

• Andy has had all he can take off his new helper. When Lou returns, Andy is delighted and nearly makes a mistake...

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December 25, 2006

• Lou informs Andy they're going to Disney World.

• In Paris, Anne, Dr Lawrence and Dr Beagry visit the Louvre.

• Spanish Holiday rep' Carol Beer manages to upset a holidaying couple.

• Myfanwy opens a new gay bar on the Greek island of Mykonos and recruits Daffyd to hand out flyers.

• On the plane, Lou manages to arrange permission for Andy and himself to visit the cockpit.

• In Italy Maggie tries to get rather more personal with Judy than she would like.

• The holidaying couple try to book an excursion with Carol, unfortunately for them she's armed with a computer.

• Vicky is awaiting trial in a Tai prison for smuggling Heroin.

• In Mykonos Daffyd is having difficulty finding gay customers for Myfanwy's bar.

• Lou and Andy are shown around the cockpit of the plane however Andy has his eye on a big red button.

• Marjorie Dawes takes an American FatFighter class but soon finds out that her insults won't work with the natives.

• Myfanwy's opening night isn't going to plan.

• Carol Beer is on the war path after the holiday couple make a complaint about her.

• Bubbles gate crashes Ronnie Corbett's Monte Carlo mansion.

• Surviving the plane crash Lou and Andy find themselves on a mysterious tropical island.

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December 30, 2006

• Lou tries his best to get Andy and himself rescued. Andy's just bored, but not for long.

• Before Vicky is sentenced Shelley Pollard makes a plea on behalf of her daughter.

• Dudley and Ting Tong spend their honeymoon in Belgium with Dudley's brother and his new Russian bride Ivanka.

• Bubbles visits a Swiss clothing boutique.

• Lou brings food for Andy, strangely he's not hungry anymore.

• Ting Tong finds an interesting video in a Belgium sex shop.

• Dr Lawrence takes Anne to Vatican City to see the Pope.

• Kenny Craig meets his match in a Portuguese hotel.

• Lou faces the dangers of the sea in order to save Andy.

• Mr Mann's life long search for a pirate memory game has taken him to a shop in Morocco.

• At the White House, Sebastian is obsessed about the PM's suggestion of a 'special relationship'.

• The UK Fat Fighters group receive a Texan replacement for Marjorie.

• Ting Tong exposes Ivanka.

• The Prime Minister and the President have finished their meeting.

• Lou finally reaches home to find Andy safe, but how did he get there before him?

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