A kiss is just a kiss, but it could mean trouble when the kisser is Dan's buddy Arnie, and the kissee is Roseanne.

Lending money to pal Arnie comes easily for Dan, but he believes that borrowing from family only adds up to disaster.

Roseanne, mistaken for a guy in her lumberjack Halloween costume, plays along with some braggarts and learns about machismo.

Roseanne's PMS day and Dan's birthday are on a collision course.

Against Dan's wishes, Roseanne forges ahead with wedding preparations, with Crystal revealing she's pregnant with Ed's child.

Roseanne is mad at Dan for forgetting Valentine's Day, so he winds up full-figure lingerie shopping; and Darlene's upset when a boy she likes asks out Becky instead.

Roseanne helps Crystal with her Lamaze classes; Dan's near-fatal accident at work makes D.J. follow him obsessively; Dan and Roseanne sit up all night doing their wills, and Jackie is offended that she doesn't get custody of the kids.

The Connors celebrate Mother's Day with a barbecue with Roseanne's feisty grandmother.

Jackie awakens and is horrified to find that she has slept with Arnie; Dan invites Leon home for the weekly poker game; D.J. trades his comics for a dog.

Roseanne is convinced that Kathy Bowman will take revenge for the Halloween prank she played on her; Jackie flirts with a moose at the Lodge costume party only to discover that it's former boyfriend Booker (in his last appearance).

Arnie decides to wed Nancy in Las Vegas, inviting Dan and Roseanne to stand up for them.

The Conners risk getting thrown out of a Vegas nightclub, and visit a wedding chapel with Arnie and Nancy.

It is Crystal's choice to choose where the gals' night out will be. Crystal chooses bingo and they all hate it. After Roseanne wins $50 playing bingo, she gets hooked on it. Becky and Darlene babysit Little Ed, but when Dan comes home its D.J. and Dan that end up taking care of the baby. Roseanne and Crystal get into a fight, but at the end they make up and Roseanne learns that Crystal is pregnant again.

When Dan and Arnie struggle to bring their bowling team out of last place, some unexpected competition arises. Meanwhile, Roseanne feels shut out of Jackie's new friendship with Nancy.

A doctor recommends that Roseanne undergo breast reduction surgery for her back problems.

Mark turns to alcohol to solve his problems with Becky, and Dan lies to Roseanne about the boy's drunken, reckless evening at the Lobo Lounge to cover both their tracks.

As the luncheonette closes and the bike shop folds, D.J.'s scholastic achievement is the only light on the Conners' dim horizon. (Coda: an ice-cream fight in the Conner kitchen; Arnie is abducted by aliens)

The Lunch Box welcomes its first customers, including a weirdo whose presence sends the gals to a self-defense class. Meanwhile, Arnie questions his own manhood after hearing that Nancy is gay.

The Conners and the Tildens travel to California in a motor home, with Dan pondering his future and Ty contemplating Jackie.