REWARD! Last night, The Incredible Steve attended an off-campus party where his penis was lost. He just wants it back, so his family is offering a $10,000 REWARD for its safe return, no questions asked. Please contact the Godolkin Daily Classifieds Office or the Lost-and-Found Desk at the Godolkin Student Union.

Calling all God U #Hometeamers! Today we’re protesting Socialist Victoria Neuman’s town hall on campus! Let’s show Neuman and her Supe-hating woke mob that we won’t put up with their anti-Superhero agenda! THEY WILL NOT CONTROL US! #MakeAmericaSuperAgain #SupeLivesMatter