Live From New York, it's...Chris Parnell

Sketches include: ""Bush Addresses The Nation on the USS Abraham Lincoln"", ""Count Chocula Silver"", ""Jarret's Room: 'Reloaded'"", ""Madonna: An American Life"", ""Plagiarism Class"", ""The Falconer vs. The Muskrateer/Backstage SNL: No 'Punking'"", ""Politics Today"", ""50's Ent."", and ""Global Century Investments""

50 Cent performs: In Da Club (with G-Unit) and 21 Questions (with G-Unit and Nate Dogg)

The ""Mom Jeans"" fake commercial from the episode after this (Adrien Brody/Sean Paul and Wayne Wonder) is added in the E! rerun of this episode

Live From New York, it's...Paula Abdul

Sketches include: ""Primetime Live: The American Idol Scandal,"" ""Sally & Dan Harrison: The Couple That Should Be Divorced,"" ""Donald Trump's Domino's Ad,"" ""Versace Mother's Day,"" ""Channel 5 Late Night Movie,"" ""Mother's Day Brunch,"" ""Helping Hands Telethon,"" ""Merv the Perv,"" ""Action News,"" ""Bear City"" (film), and ""You Might Be A Gay Redneck If...""

System of a Down perform: ""B.Y.O.B"" and ""Aerials""

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Actor Ashton Kutcher hosts; Them Crooked Vultures perform "Mind Eraser, No Chaser" and "New Fang." Sketches include "On the Record w/ Greta Van Susteren," "Gertrude's Will," "The View," "Cialis for Threeways Commercial," "Roman Slave Boy," "Weekend Update" with guests Liam (a teenager who just woke up), Eliot Spitzer, Jean K. Jean, and Garth and Kat, "What Is Burn Notice?" "Access Hollywood's Oscar Coverage," "An Even-Tempered Apology from Rahm Emanuel," and "Wedding Band.