Stan Smith uses his CIA skills to help 13-year-old son Steve win class president and the heart of the hottest girl in class, Lisa Silver. But when being class president makes Steve mad with power, Stan must jump in to save the day. Meanwhile, Roger, the alien Stan saved from Area 51, helps 18-year-old Hayley with her school paper. In return, she hooks him up with boatloads of junk food to curb his sweet tooth. Unfortunately, some Chocodiles send him over the edge and a sugar crash prohibits him from finishing one of her papers, forcing Hayley to pick up the pieces. And Klaus, the goldfish with the brain of a German guy, pines after mother Francine. Unfortunately for Klaus, the closest he'll ever get to a date with her is the spin cycle with her sports bra.

Stan Smith is mad because after getting his wife a job (or "hobby") as a Real Estate agent, she makes more money than him. In the meantime, his daughter Hayley ran a program that helped the homeless, and Stan's son Steve had an idea to have a Bum Fight program. To get back and to try to gain more money than his wife, Stan takes Steve's idea and starts a Bum Fight Night where he takes bets and treats the homeless like wrestlers. But with the homeless petition, Stan has to end up fighting like a homeless man himself.

Hayley comes home from a Green Party rally with her hair dyed green, instigating a fight with Stan. While she's sleeping, Stan cuts her hair (for her own good, of course). After learning of what Stan did, a wigged Hayley defies her father yet again by moving into the van of her new boyfriend. When Stan cuts her off financially, she gets a job as a waitress in a strip club, which pushes Stan right off the edge. Meanwhile, Steve tries to pass Roger off as his disfigured sister in order to cop a feel with a female classmate.

Stan has his heart set on speaking at the Republican National Convention on behalf of the Langley chapter, but when they pass him up for another candidate, he accepts the only endorsement he gets from the local chapter of Gay Republicans. While the people around him disapprove of his new lifestyle choice, Stan decides to follow his heart to speak on their behalf.

Stan prays for a friend and one is provided: a guy named Brett who's like him in every way but one--he's an atheist. So Stan has some evangelizing to do. Meanwhile, Steve is accepted into wizardry school.

After almost dying in a car crash, Stan decides that he must do something important with his life, so he digs for the gold he claims Iran-Contra figure Oliver North buried beneath his house. Meanwhile, Roger poses as a sexually provocative female office worker, hoping he'll be harassed so he can sue over it.

When the Smith family goes to church on Christmas Day, Stan is furious when he can’t get a good seat. While Francine tries to ease his frustration, a moment of divine intervention occurs. Upset that he has been left on earth with Francine during the ultimate fight between good and evil, Stan ditches his wife to get into the pearly gates of heaven, but when Francine is kidnapped, Stan fights to get her back.

When Stan gets told by Francine to get rid of his gas-guzzling SUV, he and Roger hatch up a plan at the local horse track to avoid losing his car. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends help an old friend.

Stan puts down liberal social programs because he thinks they are a waste of money and gives Francine a hard time for lending a helping hand at the local homeless shelter. When Stan develops a nasty addiction and needs help, he suddenly has a change of heart.

Stan offers a reward to the person who can stop Hayley and her old boyfriend from eloping.

Wanting to have the scariest haunted house on the block, Stan comes up with a ''killer'' setup; Steve competes to win the heart of his overprotective friend's younger sister.

After an argument between Stan and Francine breaks out, Stan suggests they go see a counselor, who hypnotizes Francine and reawakens her lifelong dream of being a comedian. Meanwhile, back in Langley Falls, Steve brings home a potential love interest for Klaus.

If there’s one thing that Stan Smith loves, it’s a good jury trial. He anxiously awaits his annual jury summons. But when Roger is the defendant in the trial where Stan is the foreman, he is finally in a position to make Roger accountable for his misdeeds. Meanwhile, Jeff and Hayley move in with the Smiths, and Francine tries to get Jeff to clean up his act.

Despite Francine's warning, Stan gives Steve a gun for Christmas; Steve accidentally shoots Santa.

When Steve has trouble crossing over into the "cool kids" social circle, Klaus and Roger place their bets to see how quickly Roger can make him cool. Everything they try backfires until Steve becomes the in-crowds designated driver. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine take turns pranking each other.

Stan and Francine fight over how to redecorate the house. It goes so far that they split the house down the middle and try to live without each other. Meanwhile, Principal Lewis discovers a talent of Barry.

Francine gets a job at Stan’s office, which cramps Stan’s style and his ability to flirt with co-workers.

When Francine retaliates with a little flirting of her own, war breaks out at work.

When a hurricane hits Langley Falls, the Smiths fight like mad to survive in their home. The crossover starts on The Cleveland Show S03E02 The Hurricane (I) and Family Guy S10E02 Seahorse Seashell Party (II).

When Steve tries to prove himself as a macho man to Stan, he follows in Roger's footsteps and tries to change himself from the outside in with a superhero persona. Meanwhile, Francine is going through an identity crisis of her own when she receives surprising news that could change the family forever.

A talk show reveals that Francine was the toddler who, famously, was rescued from a well by a firefighter; Francine makes a discovery when she falls down the well on the anniversary of her rescue; Stan and Roger come up with a business idea.

The Smiths get drunk at Roger's Mardi Gras party and make a pact with Bullock; Roger tries to find the person who left a pastie in the attic.

Francine regrets deciding to teach Roger the value of hard work; Steve interviews Stan for a school project.

Stan attempts to infiltrate the "Occupy" movement, based on CIA intelligence that a leftist cell is planning a terrorist attack. But when he's captured and returned home by a group of radicals, Hayley suspects her father may have been "turned".

Roger is forced to sell his beloved attic bar to a restaurant chain after suffering a heart attack, and a sexy new next-door neighbor promises to take Steve and his friends’ virginity in return for housework.

Greg and Terry decide to adopt a 10-year-old Russian boy named Michael. At a party celebrating the decision, Roger is jealous of Greg and Terry's fabulous lifestyle of culture and sophistication. Roger rejects the Smith family as trashy and impersonates Michael, successfully integrating into his new home.