Michael Markowitz — Writer

Episodes 18

Gripes of Wrath

0%
March 19, 1994
1x3

A comment Duckman makes at the unveiling of a new supercomputer, named Loretta, makes the world a better place to live in, for a while anyway.

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Ride the High School

0%
April 16, 1994
1x6

Duckman receives a letter offering Ajax a chance to go to a boarding school for gifted children. After visiting Ajax's current school, Duckman decides that Ajax must go to the boarding school. The family begins to miss Ajax's presence. Cornfed decodes one of Ajax's letter's and they go to the school to bring Ajax back, but it turns out the school is a front for Duckman's arch-nemesis, ""King"" Chicken.

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Joking the Chicken

0%
Season Finale
June 11, 1994
1x13

A group of comedians hire Duckman to stop a pathetic mild mannered politically correct chicken whose ""clean"" stand up routine becomes a comedy sensation. The chicken's routines are funny to everyone except Duckman, who soon discovers the source of his popularity.

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Papa Oom M.O.W. M.O.W.

0%
March 11, 1995
2x1

While trying to grab a couple of women in the ass, Duckman saves the president's life. When this fact is later revealed, Duckman tries to capitalize on his sleazy image.

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Duckman, in search of his free clock radio, takes the family out to the desert. They wind up in a small town where ""King"" Chicken is the sheriff and Duckman is put on trial for being a heretic.

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Color of Naught

0%
January 27, 1996
3x4

Duckman again foils King Chicken's plot for revenge. This time King Chicken has produced a product that makes everything beautiful, everything except Duckman. The only problem being is that this product is actually a virus that de-evolves everything. Duckman must again battle King Chicken and save the world.

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Apocalypse Not

0%
February 24, 1996
3x7

After the city gets attacked by one of Duckmans over-inflated dolls, the city decides to have an emergency drill where all the residents go underground till the drill passes. Duckman fails to know about the drill and has a city-wide 'party' (involving mass destrution) while all the residents are gone. Eventually the residents return to chase Duckman out of town.

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3x15

Duckman is cast in a hospital educational film with Joe Walsh; for his part he is put into a MRI chamber. The film crew is thrown out of the lab and Duckman forgotten. Left too long in the chamber, a mutation occurs which a doctor identifies as a cure for cancer. Now everyone wants Duckman's brain for their own purposes. Meanwhile, Agnes is still impersonating Grandma-ma.

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The Road to Dendron

0%
May 11, 1996
3x16

A parody of the Hope/Crosby Road pictures is done in this episode as Duckman and Cornfed act as chaperones for Ajax's class trip to the Sudan. Ajax is kidnapped. Duckman and Cornfed must rescue Ajax from a Sultan, his Fakir and a beautiful princess.

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Dammit, Hollywood

0%
January 4, 1997
4x1

Annoyed with the current state of the film industry, Duckman goes to Hollywood to demand his $7 back. Instead, he falls into the plot of a soon-to-be deposed studio executive, a man who's looking for a patsy to run the studio into the ground in hopes of saving his own job. Duckman becomes head of Paradox Pictures, where ""if it's a good movie its a Paradox"". He quickly begins running through the studio's money, signs a secretary to a 340 million dollar deal to star in a movie in her underpants. The deposed executive also arranges it so that Duckman manages to alienate the studio's three biggest action stars.

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From Brad to Worse

0%
February 1, 1997
4x5

Duckman finds an old high school classmate who's been homeless due to something Duckman did to him 20 years ago. Duckman's attempts to help only make things worse.

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Bonfire of the Panties

0%
February 8, 1997
4x6

Cornfed along with Charles and Mambo prepare the ultimate aphrodisiac for Duckman to turn his love life around. They give him a limited amount of the potion, but he quickly replicates it in huge batches. Now he has more woman than he can deal with. Bernice discovers what is going on and demands that he stop. When the real thing occurs between Duckman and actress Courtney Thorne-Smith, no one believes him.

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Role With It

0%
February 15, 1997
4x7

Duckman takes the family and the staff on a holiday to a real Indian reservation, with a casino. While there, a psychiatrist notices Duckman and the rest of the family's overall self-destructive behavior. She offers them treatment that involves a role-playing session that uncovers some of their real issues.

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Bev Takes a Holiday

0%
March 22, 1997
4x12

Bernice travels to Washington to assume her new role as Congresswoman. Duckman spots a woman who happens to look like Beatrice, but gets hit by a bus. It turns out that she is Beatrice and Bernice's long lost triplet. Bev realizes the only way to keep Duckman alive is to pretend to be Beatrice.

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Duckman plans a big poker for the evening. Unfortunately before the game his obnoxious Uncle Mo arrives and claims he is dying. To avoid the curse that befell his cousin, Duckman tries to wait on him hand and foot. Just how much of his Uncle can he take?

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Duckman and Cornfed become plumbers and their first job takes them to a society gathering in a mansion. While not doing his job, Duckman discovers that the cursed ""Sharon Stone"" is missing; he and Cornfed try to recover the diamond before the hostess discovers the theft. After the diamond is revealed to be missing, its curse comes into play and traps them in the mansion.

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Das Sub (a.k.a. Class Warfare)

0%
August 16, 1997
4x26

Convicted of fraud, Duckman is sentenced to 5,000 hours of community service. He is sent to a dangerous inner-city high school, located a half a block from his house, where he becomes a substitute teacher and it turns out that his is the most ""Dangerous Mind.""

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Four Weddings Inconceivable

0%
Season Finale
September 6, 1997
4x28

At the wedding of Dr. Ben Stein, a series of emotional epiphanies lead to an amazing set of marriage proposals. King Chicken proposes to Bernice. Cornfed proposes to Beverly. Duckman proposes to his new love, King Chicken's ex Honey. After many arguments between the principles, Duckman says he will make all the arrangements, thereby letting everyone blame him. Despite his arrangements, the ceremony goes off with the appropriate hitches, except that Duckman finds out something that Cornfed forgot to tell him.

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