Abbie Cornish as Penne

Episodes 10

Episode 1

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August 27, 200125m
1x1

On Today's Tips, Todd shows you how to speed up your excavation by burying human remains in your yard as well as how to secure your stuff from the junkie in the family. Penne demonstrates the cheapest way to enjoy cheap travel to exotic international destinations. On Anglo File, Dr Rudi teaches Anglo-Australians how to improve their lives by absorbing all the best aspects of multiculturalism and later, he takes a look at an exciting new sex technique. Sigourney shows you how to make your own AIDS ribbon and demonstrates the power of networking. On Viewer Mail, Penne introducers viewers to the ancient art of Feng Shui for the single apartment dweller

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Episode 2

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September 3, 200125m
1x2

Sigourney shows women how to disguise the men folk's essential items, as well as those attention grabbing disabilities. On Today's Tips, Todd show viewers how to look bookish while not losing valuable space while on Child Watch, Penne looks at the affect a controversial new alternative band, Chamber Mouth, is having on children. Dr Rudi shows viewers how to increase their house's value at auction and informs the dumpy darlings the medical secret beind successfull weight loss. Todd demonstrates how to make Vietnamese spring rolls, using Aussie ingredients.

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Episode 3

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September 10, 200125m
1x3

Sigourney shows viewers how handicrafts and the right attitude can impove the lives of those around us. Dr Rudi offers some advice on keeping your wine safely on the self using readily available plutonium isotopes. Penne shows budding music remixers where to find copyright-free recordings with plenty of dramatic sounds. On Todd's Tips, Todd talks foreplay and later shows viewers a DIY alternative to expensive acupuncture. Sigourney and Penne show viewers how to use a potato to make your own nightclub stamps. Prompted by a letter from a viewer, Todd teaches viewers how to cook a restaurant quality french meal.

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Episode 4

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September 17, 200125m
1x4

Todd demonstates how to make your smoke alarm double as a burglar alarm. Penne reveals how to send your mail for free and how to apply the same methods for international travel. Sigourney instructs her female viewers how to use their OCD to set a proper table every time and later reveals the aromatic wonders of Buddhism. Dr Rudi dispenses some timely advise about drugs and their side effects and reveals how to get more money into your lifestyle. Penne shows how to lift yourself out of poverty with just a little ingenuity and creativity (and a government arts grant) and how to run a community child care centre for the good of the children, and your wallet. Todd shows how to keep your wet concrete free of grafiti and how to make your own Prosac at home with ingredients found in the kitchen.

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Episode 5

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September 24, 200125m
1x5

Penne offers some valuable tips sure to improve your odds on home invasions, and later, demonstrates how to use legal loopholes in court. Dr Rudi offers sime practical advise for prudent parents with gifted a child. Todd shows how your old old chook run can be converted into refugee accomodations while Sigourney tells about the practical advantages of having your refugee's help around the house. To help protect your lifesavings, Dr Rudi provides investment advice for the average Australian. Penne shows how to use an old relative to save your place in a queue, or wait in line for tickets, or nab the best parking spots and transit lanes. Sigourney shows how to disguise a black eye while Todd reminds viewers not to be too prowd to ask for help on those tricky DIY projects.

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Episode 6

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October 1, 200125m
1x6

Sigourney shows women how a teddy bear can be a crafty drinking buddy and reveals the secret to getting honest advice from shop assistants. Dr Rudi informs immigrant Australians about the benefits of sunbathing and gives men tips on urinal use. Penne reveals the benefit of an anorexic flatmate, shows those with rediculous names how to get retribution, and instructs on how to keep freeloading oversees travelers from crashing at your house. Todd shows cellphone users how to protect themselves from radiation and demonstrates what to do in case of a power tool accident. On viewer mail, Dr Rudi addresses a viewer unhappy with the show. and later, show viewers the benefits of having an internet shopping buddy. Sigourney shows how to recreate the sleazy motel feel in your home to keep the romance sizzling.

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Episode 7

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October 8, 200125m
1x7

Penne provides a handy tip for the would-be getway driver, shows how to benefit from the Year of the Volunteer, and reveals the benefits of starting your own religion. Todd talks fertilizer, solves the age-old seat up/seat down dilema, and shows how to create the perfect setting for a romantic picnic. Dr Rudi shows viewers how to prevent sudden infant death syndrome and reveals the newest trend in plastic surgery to beautify a very private body part. Sigourney offers hints on cutting down your shipping costs.

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Episode 8

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October 15, 200125m
1x8

Penne shows you how to rock hard in the mosh pit and live to see the next day and reveals the secret to getting a free massage as well as the most cheapest and easiest ways of making money from your lcoal beach. Todd puts some groove back into your nightclub moves with a DIY project, offers some top tips to help his male viewers get a fairer share of the fairer sex and shows how magnets can help the hemorrhoid sufferer. Sigourney demonstrates the modern woman's best ways to meet a man and offers an invaluable tip for preventing shaken baby syndrome. Dr Rudi shows you how to keep track of the people that matter and shows viewers his celebrity spoon collection as an example of an investment hobby.

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Episode 9

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October 22, 200125m
1x9

Dr Rudi offers a festive tip on how to make ends meet at Christmas, offers advise to parents wanting to know if their son might be gay, and helps parents keep their kids safe on the internet. Penne lets viewers in on the most effective way to advertise, shows how a gambling orphan can be your ticket to an income welfare stream. Todd has a holiday video project for the lonely and alienated, and offers advice for the recently incarerated. Sigourney shows how an annoyingly attentive admirer can make a great accessory and offers a handy tip for keeping the family slim and attractive.

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Episode 10

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Season Finale
October 29, 200125m
1x10

Sigourney shows the modern woman how to design her way to a better sex life, how to keep dinner party conversation entertaining and offers investing advice to reap the maximum return. Todd has more top tips on home security and bush tucker cooking. Penne lets viewers in on how to do their banking without being done by fees and shows seniors how to stay safe when going out after dark. Dr Rudi introduces viewers to the latest little device to organise your life, shows how to deal with a prevalent public problem, and helps parents protect their children from the influence of their imaginary friend.

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