Phantom Thread (2017)

Written by Gimly on March 11, 2018

I saw Phantom Thread as part of a trio. We began watching this Oscar nominated movie at staggered intervals. I, from the beginning. The second, a half hour in. Then her partner, just past the half-way point. But all of us came to the same reaction when we'd been watching for what seemed like days only to realise there was still 30 minutes left: Lying on the cold, dirty floor, begging for it to end.

Prepare for the most heterosexual thing I have ever said: We had to watch YouTube clips of Arnold Schwarzenegger movie-kills and then the whole original Robocop as a palette cleanser after being forced to endure Phantom Thread. That's not hyperbole either, it felt genuinely necessary so that's what we did. I fear that we live in the world where something this pretentious is considered one of the best movies of the year.

Final rating:★ - Of no value. Avoid at all costs.