John has dog problems with just about everyone: Greeley, over a magazine piece about his childhood family pet who bit people; Ellen, who makes him sleep on the couch after an argument about animals' eyes; and Lydia, who wants a new puppy. Then Christabel, the family's ancient poodle, becomes ill, and everyone seems to hold John at fault.

Frustrated while trying to buy a Christmas present for Lydia, John makes the unfortunate choice of an American flag as her gift. Lydia is not pleased, and when the people in the neighborhood learn of John's inappropriate gift, a group of them show up at the Monroe's accusing him of having his holidays confused.